texas biscuit

sxsw

2007-03-06T21:42:00.000-06:00

Anyone making plans to go to SXSW in Austin next weekend??
Looks like we'll be able to make it this year and we are so stoked.

new news

2007-03-03T17:17:00.000-06:00

Lots going on the past week:

* Finally got the Camry out of the shop - they were able to repair both the water pump and oil pump for less than expected. I can't speak highly enough of Scott's Complete Auto Care. Glenn has consistently given the best customer service, and all seems to be well with the car.

* My grandmother had a quarter-sized skin cancer removed from her forehead and is doing just fine. She has to have another removed from her chest next week. It's a big reminder that I need to see a dermatologist soon - haven't had my moles checked by a specialist in many years.

* Our xbox360 blew up again - we'd only had it back from the repair center for 7 days before we got the dreaded red ring of lights - the second time in only two months. It's under warranty and is going back for repair again.

* We took my mom out to lunch for her 63rd birthday today. Triple-J Chophouse. I had the Honey Pecan Crusted Salmon Salad - deeeelicious! Nice atmosphere and fantastic service as well.

* Never found my debit card - had to cancel it today - blast. I hate that two week period of not being able to buy anything online, pay bills, etc. Oh well, new one is in the mail, and maybe I can be more careful with this one.

* The computers at my work have been totally fudged up since they did an update that was supposed to make things run more smoothly - big backfire. Huge. Now I can't print, lost Firefox and can't download anything, no Flash, no iTunes, and stupid IE is sooooo slow and cumbersome. On the other hand, my husband got a couple of pieces of very very exciting news at work this week and we can't wait to see the final products.

* All for now - hope everyone is enjoying their weekend!

lost it

2007-03-02T11:11:00.000-06:00

Email exchange between me and hubs after last night's drunken escapade to the local margarita bar.

ME --
Good news: I didn't leave my card at Chimy's because I used it after the bar at Jimmy Johns.
Bad news: I still can't find my card.
Worse news: I think I might have thrown it away this morning if it was in the JJ's sack, and I'm not climbing into the dumpster to find out. The receipt was on the table, but no card. Ugh. Still looking. Stupid Drunky McLoseShit.

HIM --
Oh god if you go dumpster diving please take a picture. Preferably one of you in the dumpster and looking frowny with a banana peel on your head.

oscar recap

2007-02-26T08:30:00.000-06:00

I can't recall the last time I sat through an entire awards show, or any four-hour program for that matter. But I didn't have much else going on last night, and really enjoyed the Academy Awards. So here goes, my first (and likely last) ever Oscar highlights in the book of TB.

In the matter of time, I think they could have cut back on a few of the montages, and the Jack Black/Will Farrell song - even though I heart John C Reilly, it did nothing for me. Ellen was a pretty good hostess (I loved that white tux), although I would've liked to see more standup and less crowd interaction from her. Maybe she had a great zinger saved for the end but all they had time for was that "Thank You! Goodnight!"

I was most excited to see Jennifer Hudson win for best supporting actress - what a heartfelt thank you speech. Gorgeous stage performance too - great job Dreamgirls! And Jennifer in that red dress - HOT! Imagine going from an American Idol reject (too harsh?) to winning an Oscar in less than a year. I'm so proud of her. I was equally moved by Forest Whitaker's speech, nice that he took a moment to share his motivation to act and his dream to touch people through his gift.

I think The Departed for Best Picture was a fantastic choice. Of course, it was one of the only two movies I saw in this year's category, so I'm biased. But I loved the crap out of that movie. And good for Scorsese - well deserved, man.

The dancers were incredible!! (Per? Par? Porabolas?? P-something or another.) Especially loved that penguin interlude for Happy Feet - too cute - I just can't imagine how they do it.

And as for fashion, which normally is the only thing I care about at awards shows... Cate Blanchett was my numero uno pick - she is so freaking elegant and refined (nice contrast to myself who just used the word "freaking" to describe something beautiful) - just stunning in that shimmery silvery number. Beautiful silhouette. Love her. Reese Witherspoon - gorgeous as always - Ryan Phillipe is a fool. Naomi Watts - super sweet and just lovely. I want to go on a picnic with her. And I never thought I'd say this, but Jennifer Lopez looked really classy as well, that flowy Grecian thing really worked for her. I didn't hear anyone say, were those diamonds encrusted on the top?!!!

Running out of time here, so will make this quick: My only yucks - Kristen Dunst (a collar on an evening gown?!), Cameron Diaz (it looked so uh, Max Headroom!) and Gwenyth (salmon gauze?! Ugh).

Can't wait until they make it to the top of my Blockbuster Queue: Pan's Labyrinth, The Queen, King of Scotland, Half Nelson, Babel.

caturday

2007-02-24T12:21:00.000-06:00

"texas biscuit is..."

2007-02-23T14:37:00.000-06:00

I'm not much in the mood for blogging today, but had this lovely lil meme ready to go for just such an occasion.

Google your name in quotes with an "is" — ex.: "[your real name] is" — pick your favorite ten responses and post them.

UPDATE: Just use your first name for tons of goodness.

1. Texas Biscuit is fashion. She lives it, she breaths it, she's in your face with it. She is it's biggest fan.

2. Why Texas Biscuit is no longer on my blogroll...

3. Texas Biscuit is all set to sparkle.

4. Texas Biscuit is quoted as an expert on Internet topics, privacy, and other issues relating to technology and society.

5. Texas Biscuit is yet to play a game this season after only just returning to training last month after nearly a year on the sidelines with a knee injury.

6. Texas Biscuit is a discolored mauve.

7. Texas Biscuit is a great cook and everybody looks forward to taking a doggy bag home.

8. Texas Biscuit is found unconscious and nearly dead from starvation.

9. Texas Biscuit is actually a double agent, working to sabotage the CIA's work against the criminal organization and is, contrary to her air of innocence, a cold-blooded killer.

10. Our little Texas Biscuit is all growed up.

chippendales

2007-02-21T00:03:00.000-06:00

Lubbock has stooped to a new low. Last Friday night, the famous Chippendale dancers were arrested at a local sports bar, only about 45 minutes into their performance for "simulating sexual acts". C'mon, we all know of the Chippendale's reputation - and that is exactly why 400 people paid $20 each to see their show. It isn't like these innocent babes showed up at their quilting bee and were caught off guard by the racy show. Tickets were only sold to adults 18 and over, and only adults were allowed entrance to the bar. The crowd knew exactly what they were getting into, so why is the Lubbock City Council pushing their own oppressive values and warped morality onto its citizens?!

Granted, Lubbock is known for having the highest per capita of churches in the state, we're in the heart of the Bible Belt, and we only got a Hooters a year ago, but jeebus, THEY STILL HAD THEIR PANTS ON!!

As all our friends graduate and leave town and family encourages us to leave Lubbock, I've always done my best to talk up the community, to remind everyone about the friendly people, our progressive university, the lack of traffic, the mild climate, etc. But seriously, when we have to take heat from the national media about the ignorance and intolerance of those in charge of our great city, well, it just makes me totally ready to get out of this town that I've called home for the past 14 years. We've been talking about it for some time. In less than six months, we'll be calling a new city home.

early favorites (guys)

2007-02-20T20:55:00.000-06:00

Hmmmm. I was planning an entire post about my early favorites for this season's AI. I've had my blog post open ... waiting ... waiting ... still waiting. Where are all the rock stars?! Why aren't my bobby socks knocked off on week one?! Finally a chance to WOW us with a full performance and background music, and we got diddly squat.

For the moment, I like Brandon (best chance to take the big win) and Blake - they were the only stand outs in my book. And even though I didn't love his song, I'd still vote for Chris Sligh (but I never vote until the last few weeks). Overall, like Simon said about one of the first guys, I think all the dudes lost their sparkle.

sledding

2007-02-19T12:17:00.000-06:00

Last week Anonymous Coworker posted that he got to go sledding during his lunch break. Lucky!

So before all the snow melts, I wanted to post some of my own sledding pics. We went to Colorado over Christmas to visit TBH's family. We were fortunate enough to be able to drive up just after Denver's first blizzard, and leave two days before the second one blew in. We took these pics on Christmas Eve, on a hill just a few blocks from his sister's home.

This is TBH's niece - getting some pretty serious air on a jump.

This would be me - my very first sledding ride EVER (I was a deprived child growing up in the deep south where we had neither snow nor hills). So I was a little excited.

This would be my wonderful husband at the bottom of the run. Wrooooo!

faking it

2007-02-18T23:04:00.000-06:00

Can you tell if your partner is faking it? Their smile, that is. Found this fun little survey on the BBC's website. Surprisingly, I got 20 out of 20 correct when watching a short video clip of a person smiling and guessing if it is "genuine" or "fake". Guess it's the counselor in me digging for honest emotion in my clients.

The site says: Most people are surprisingly bad at spotting fake smiles. One possible explanation for this is that it may be easier for people to get along if they don't always know what others are really feeling.

Have a few minutes to spare? Take the quiz here.

sexy bitch

2007-02-17T11:52:00.000-06:00

Last night was the first Friday night in three weeks TBH and I weren't drinking $5 pitchers at Conference Cafe during happy hour (if by happy hour you know I mean until midnight). We went to our favorite chinese buffet for dinner instead, then were too stuffed on sesame chicken and cheese rangoons to go out. So we enjoyed Friday night in our PJs on the couch.

I was excited to see the new season of Russell Simmons' Def Poetry Jam started this week. I'm consistently amazed with the intensity of the poetry these guys and gals can spit. I can barely put together a coherent blog post, much less write a lyrical poem, and I would never have the balls to get on stage and attempt the kind of heartfelt rhythmic performance these artists give.

I'm touched by their pain and inspired by their honesty.

There were several great readings last night including a fantastic husband/wife duo, but my favorite performance of the night was by a big guy in jorts who goes by Big Mike. I transcribed this straight off the TiVo recording, so I apologize to the author for any unintentional errors. But seriously, Big Mike has got it all figured out:

I’m six foot one
Two hundred and seventy five pounds
Two percent muscle
Ninety eight percent body fat
See I’m not the prettiest mother fucker
But I’m a sexy ass bitch

I’m sexy like a grandmother raising her children
And now raising her children’s children
‘Cause they’re too busy getting their groove on
See life ain’t nothing but a party in clubs
But clubs are for pretty mother fuckers

But Chucky Cheese … now Chucky Cheese is for the grown and sexy
Fathers flexing their muscle so little Junior can whack a mole
You got nannies and grannies bending their old asses over trying to play ski ball
Victoria Secret in hooker boots can never compare to a MILF in the supermarket with curlers, sweats, and house shoes
God that’s so sexy

Those once perky breasts that now sag after feeding your third child is sexy
My eight year old coming home and saying, “Daddy, I got Student of the Month” and I say, “Damn, baby, that’s kinda sexy”
My wife who can cook dinner as she talks on the phone while watching novellas and pops my son for trying to steal the Oreos before he eats

Librarians are sexy
Teachers are sexy
25 years of marriage in the Age of Divorce is sexy
Look beneath the surface and find the true meaning of sexy
My Big & Tall gear may never get me Red Carpet status
My jewelry has no bling
But I pride myself on the fact that I’m pretty good at this daddy-thing
It’s so fucking sexy

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie can adopt all the little Africans they want
They are not sexy
Nicole Richie, Paris Hilton, eat some cupcakes bitches
‘Cause you are not sexy
Mrs Brady is sexy
Al Bundy was sexy
Florida Evans from Good Times - damn, damn, damn she was sexy
And me, Big Mike, a father, uncle, a grandfather, a teacher, a faithful husband, a loyal friend, and a responsible fucking man
I may not be the prettiest mother fucker
But I’m a sexy ass bitch

mmmm, dip

2007-02-16T08:42:00.000-06:00

Looking for a delicious creamy dip to warm up your weekend? Try this one. I've eaten some pretty good spinach/ artichoke dips in my day (one of the best catered at our wedding), but this recipe is by far my favorite, and totally simple. I made it for a New Years gathering last month, and it was a real hit. You can modify this to keep warm in a crock pot instead of baking it if you prefer. You'll want to take this one to all your gatherings!

Cheesy Spinach Artichoke Dip

INGREDIENTS

1 (10 ounce) package frozen chopped spinach, thawed and drained
1/2 cup yellow bell pepper, diced
1 clove garlic, minced
1 (6 ounce) jar artichoke hearts, drained and chopped
1 (8 ounce) tub sour cream
1/2 cup grated parmesan cheese (not the powdered kind)
1 cup grated mozzarella cheese
salt and ground black pepper to taste
1/2 pint heavy cream

DIRECTIONS

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Mix together spinach, bell pepper, garlic, artichokes, sour cream, parmesan and mozzarella cheese. Season with salt and pepper. Mixture will be thick - add cream to thin to dip consistency. Spoon into a 1 quart baking dish.
Bake for 20 minutes, or until bubbly. Serve with tortilla chips or sliced baguettes. Enjoy!

cliffhanger, ugh

2007-02-15T21:05:00.000-06:00

OMFG. Are they seriously going to let Meredith die?! I wouldn't mind too much, she is my least favorite Grey's character, but my heart will just break for McDreamy and Christina. If I were them, I'd kick that little pig-tailed girl's ass for not telling someone Meredith got pushed into the bay. Stupid scared kid. Good to see McSteamy redeem himself by being there for Derek.

I'm surprised Izzy told George that he made a mistake by marrying Callie. I agree it was premature considering their ups and downs, but I really like Callie. How could you not love a girl that is so outspoken and has no qualms wearing her panties around the house.

Quote of the night by Izzy: "If I eat a tub of butter by myself, and no one is around to see it, the calories don't count." Hope the same goes for a tube of raw cookie dough!

Do you think Meredith will be revived next Thursday?

what to do

2007-02-14T12:33:00.000-06:00

I woke up this morning around 5 to peep out the blinds and find out if we were snowed in. No luck. Even though it was a whopping 12 degrees outside, there was only about an inch or two of snow on the ground, and nothing new falling. Back to bed until the alarm goes off at 6:45.

Next thing I know it's 7:15, and still no alarm. TBH jumped up, "the power's out". Meh. He still had to go to work, but the good news for me was I'd already planned on flexing out today, so I didn't have to worry about trying to find pants that didn't need to be ironed, putting on makeup in the dark, or going to work with wet hair.

But it didn't take long to realize all the things I cherish about a day off were also off limits: no endless cups of coffee, no Today Show or CNN, no watching our newest addition to our DVD collection: The Departed or any of my other Drew Barrymore favorites, no Xbox 360 (although that option was already out since it is somewhere between Dallas and McAllen on it's way to the repair center), no scrambled eggs, no blogging, and above all no heat. Did I mention it was 12 degrees?!!

So with no electricity and freezing temps, what's a girl to do?!

Put on my extra fuzzy sucks and a fleece. Mosey to the couch with pillow and blanket in tow, and take the world's best nap. No guilt about avoiding vacuuming or cleaning out the fridge. No television or internet distractions. Nothing but me, layers of feathers, and two happy cats.

We snoozed until 10:30 when the electric company got the power back on and I was able to brew some coffee and catch up on last night's American Idol. Now that is the way to start a day.

dreaded car repairs

2007-02-13T16:50:00.000-06:00

I've had old used cars all my life. Not classic-collector-old, just old enough to be kinda dumpy and have ongoing mechanical problems. And I hate mechanical problems. Hate. With a passion. I've had the misfortune of being that girl driving down the road with steam blowing out of the engine. And on a separate occasion black steam spilling out of the exhaust pipe. I've had all kinds of rattles and knocks and squeaks. My car has died on a country road, and a couple of times in traffic (the worst feeing EVER). There was a time when I had a car with a thousand dollars in speakers and sound equipment, but no A/C. Who said anything about priorities?

My most recent used car, a mid-90s Camry has been holding up pretty well. The paint on the hood has all gone to hell (looks like a sunburn, all cracked and peeling, ugly), but it runs pretty well. Until last week ... the dreaded banging-breaking-rattle arrived with a vengeance.

So yesterday my trusty mechanic tells me the water pump and timing belt have passed on to automotive heaven, and the repair is going to be $490. We were hoping for about a $300 bill, so almost $500 is going to suck.

And then he informs me that the oil pump is also on its way out. That could be an additional $310 now since they are already into the engine, OR $650 later when they have to open the whole thing up again. Grr! I know it sounds scammy, but these guys are very reputable and did a lot of free work for us when we were car-shopping (another post!). Anyway, he said the oil pump didn't have to be done now, and will probably be manageable for some time as long as we don't let it get too low on oil.

So that is fine with me. We don't take the Camry on road trips anymore, so it gets <30 miles a week. But the fact that we're going to have to pay almost $500 now, and another $650 in a few months on a used car just kills me.

How could the Car Gods possibly keep track of each time I'm about to get current on all my bills and start saving, and have the car blow up that very month?!

first book swap

2007-02-12T00:11:00.000-06:00

I've gotten a tad burned out on selling old books on eBay and decided to try a free book swapping service I heard about last fall: BookMooch.

The service uses a point system where you earn points for listing books in your inventory, shipping requested books, and leaving feedback for others. You can earn even more points if you agree to ship internationally. It is free to use the service, and the only cost is in shipping media mail, usually under a couple bucks for paperbacks.

My only complaint so far is that while a book is on your Wish List, you can't click to search and see if it has been added to anyone's inventory. The only option is to retype the book's info and browse for it. And frankly the search feature isn't the greatest.

However I do love that they provide links to Amazon so you can quickly look up descriptions and reader reviews. Nice touch.

So last week I mailed three wedding books that I no longer needed. And in return requested three counseling books. The first one arrived today: the classic 1960s text on Transactional Analysis, Games People Play (for example SWYMD: See What You Made Me Do) by Eric Berne. It arrived only 3 days after I mooched it, and in perfect condition. For free. Excellent!

it's caturday!

2007-02-10T18:46:00.000-06:00

i'm back (again)

2007-02-08T14:16:00.000-06:00

I heard raves about the new blogger this week and reluctantly decided to check it out. Then decided to play a bit. I perused a few of my old posts, and laughed at some of the crazy and stupid things I wrote about over the past two years - many memories and feelings that I would've otherwise forgotten about. I reminisced a bit about some of the old blogs I used to read daily - good people, great writing, a few tears and a ton of laughs.

It's been 11 months since I last posted. At the time I was engaged, planning a wedding, and working as a probation officer. A lot has changed in the past year - I married my long time boyfriend, lost a grandmother, became a newbie gamerchiX, got a new job in my field, and grew another year closer to being in my mid-30s. And for whatever reason* I think I'm ready to start sharing those milestones, as well as the mundane minutia, once again.

So it is my time to get back to writing and posting pics, reading other blogs and getting back in touch with old friends from across the blogosphere. So... I'm back. For how long? I don't know. But blogging sounds like fun again, so here goes!

*To be entirely honest, I know exactly the reason why I suddenly have the time and inspiration to blog again: we got the dreaded red ring of death on our Xbox 360 last night and have to send it in for repair. Meh.

Planning

2006-03-28T22:48:00.000-06:00

I dreamed of a wedding of elaborate elegance,
A church filled with family and friends.
I asked him what kind of a wedding he wished for,
He said one that would make me his wife.
~Author Unknown

Isn't that nice? I obviously haven't taken the time to work on my blog or even post this week. But the good news is our wedding plans are coming together. We not only have a date, but also a location (and it is fantastic)! It was amazing how the whole thing has worked out almost effortlessly - as far as I'm concerned it was meant to be, at this time and in this place. Things are good.

Aren't I creative?

2006-03-21T14:45:00.000-06:00

This is my first attempt at art. Also an attempt at a thoughtful yet inexpensive birthday gift full of heart. TA DA!

Cajun the Cat ala Warhol, 1 of 1

I spent hours attempting to master Paint and use some "simple" tutorials to capture the color blocked effects, but to no avail. I'm even worse at Paint than I am at FrontPage!

Anyway, I found a fantastic little program that does everything for you (that is if you can find a photo that will look okay in primary colors, which is not as easy as you might guess). I printed several different versions, and this could become a series. I kinda like it.

Too bad it is so challenging to find a place to put something this, uh, COLORIFIC in our apartment!

*Update: I think Darth has solved my HaloScan problem, and I should have time to get everything up and running this weekend. Thanks Darth, you are the BEST!

Ah, spring

2006-03-19T19:35:00.000-06:00

The picture I used for the new banner is one that I took two years ago when TBF and I drove to Corpus and South Padre for Spring Break. I'm always amazed by the gorgeous wildflowers in South Texas, especially those bluebonnets.

It's been raining for two days straight now. And I am thrilled. We were in a real life drought - I think like 160-something days of no precipitation. And finally... cool, revitalizing, refreshing rain. We've had the back door open all day and it's been marvelous. Bring it on!

Picasa and Blogger were pissing me off this afternoon with all their errors, so I'm trying something new for posting photos: Flickr. Hope it works.

Bigger and better

2006-03-18T22:23:00.000-06:00

I've spent most of the day reworking my blog. You likey? A little easier on the eyes I hope. I started out just wanting to add a banner, but I thought, hell if I'm changing that, let's just update the whole thing. I never would've guessed this would turn into an 8-hour project! Jeebus, I am a FrontPage idiot. But I think it looks okay now. There are some things I might go back and change next week, but for now I'm just glad to be at a stopping point.

My only MAJOR concern is that when you click on the comments, the HaloScan box pops up as it should, but then the TB page also turns into a HaloScan comment box. WTF?! Any thoughts on this? Comment if you can, or email me if you have any idea about a fix. I may have to resort to adding HaloScan code again, but I had to screw with it for so long to begin with (I made the mistake of deleting the code for all Bloggers comments, then HaloScan had nothing to replace, ugh). Anyway, looking for a quick fix if you have one!

And I'm open to any other suggestions you may have, or problems you see.

P.S. My denseness could have a little bit to do with us staying at O'Reilleys until 2am with an old friend, the Killians, the Irish Car Bombs, or the $139 bar tab. Very fun night. Not so fun hangover.

Happy St Pat's!

2006-03-17T11:52:00.000-06:00

Happy St Patty's Day to me wee little friends in the blogosphere!

Today is also TBFs birthday, so we will be double-celebrating today. Green beer and whiskey for everyone!!

Have a great weekend all!

Underachiever

2006-03-15T20:55:00.000-06:00

I have been SUCH a slacker this week. I've seen all my people, but haven't done more than a smidgen of the paperwork that should accompany each appointment. Oh, and don't even get me started about filing. It all started last Wednesday when I purposely put off my work, thinking I could get caught up the following day, but unfortunately the next day brought some kind of new drama that kept me from doing my paperwork. And I have yet to get caught up.

I shouldn't be surprised. The life of a probation officer is always full of drama. Filing paperwork and verifying employment and checking UA results and doing field visits are a breeze. There are always subsequent arrests and relapses and bad attitudes and violations of curfew and new relationships and moves out of county and broken down cars and hating on counselors and hating on me and losing jobs and getting raises and being kicked out of the half-way houses and positive UAs and losing kids to CPS and tears and lies and deceit.

So these things keep me busy from 8-5.

But besides that, TBF and I have finally found a fantastic wedding venue, and we've narrowed down the date. And for the first time in months, I am really really excited about the wedding and our future as legally hitched "man and wife". I am a happy gal, and well, my job just doesn't seem so critical this week.

Brunettes have more fun

2006-03-12T21:33:00.000-06:00

This weekend I went from an old ashy blonde to ...

... a lovely healthy brunette!

Cajun approves!

Not much else going on here - lots of work, a little bit of play, some wedding planning, hockey game last Saturday, got a Sam's membership and stocked the kitchen, American Idol twice a week, trying to stay out of the wind, doing a bit of reading up on investing - more on that later. Have a good one!

And I wore Wonder Woman Underoos!

2006-02-28T21:58:00.000-06:00

This may be all-time favorite forward. Every one of these really strikes a chord with me. I wish I had my childhood pics at the house, because you guys would really get a kick out of me with my ribbon and bead barrettes, my Barbie Big Wheel, and in my Bo Duke nightgown! Enjoy!

IF YOU WERE A LITTLE GIRL IN THE 70'S *

You had that Fisher Price doctor's kit with a stethoscope that actually worked. And the shot. And the blood pressure cuff. And yep, I played doctor with a boy named Shaylor once. Sorry, mom.

You owned a bicycle with a banana seat and a plastic basket with flowers on it. No basket, but my red bike did have a horn and a red flag.

You learned to skate with actual skates (not roller blades!) that had metal wheels. And puffy pom poms tied to the laces!

You had either a "bowl cut" or "pixie", not to mention the "Dorothy Hamill". I thought bowl cut and the Dorothy Hamill was the same cut?? Anyway, I had it!

Your Holly Hobbie sleeping bag was your most prized possession. Actually I had the Wonder Woman sleeping bag - it was green outside and had red lining - classic - I think it's still in my parent's garage.

You got kicked out of the room when your parents had their adult friends over for Dallas-viewing parties on Friday nights. Just me? My friend Kimberly's parents would never let us watch with the adults!

You begged Santa for the electronic memory game, Simon.

You had the Donnie and Marie dolls with those pink and purple satiny shredded outfits. I'd forgotten about these! My best friend and I also played Donnie and Marie by singing into opposite ends of my jump rope.

You spent hours in your backyard on your metal swing set with the trapeze. Actually I had a tire swing in my front yard. Every summer my dad re-taped the chains with the color electrical tape of my choosing! Loved that tire swing.

You had homemade ribbon barrettes in every imaginable color. With loads of beads, right?

You had a pair of Doctor Scholl's sandals (the ones with hard sole & the buckle). Also got a new pair of the thick soled brown "school shoes" with the laces every September. I hated those shoes with a passion.

You wanted to be Laura Ingall Wilder really bad. You wore that Little House on the Prairie-inspired plaid, ruffle shirt with the high neck in at least one school picture. I thought the show was just okay, and only got through a couple of the Little House books, but damn! I did wear one of those lame ruffly shirts on picture day!

You wanted your first kiss to be at a roller rink. Ours was called 8-Wheels in San Angelo. I think it's still open. Actually I hated the slow-skate, but give me some Donna Summer - whooooo baby!

Your hairstyle was described as having "wings" or "feathers" and you kept it "pretty" with the comb you kept in your back pocket. This didn't happen until the 80s for me, but the pics are just as horrid!

You know who Strawberry Shortcake is, as well as her friends, Blueberry Muffin and Huckleberry Pie.

You carried a Muppets lunch box to school and it was metal, not plastic. With the thermos inside!

You and your girlfriends would fight over which of the Dukes of Hazzard was your boyfriend. Always Bo for me (until he had the domestic assault issue with his girl - shattered by girlhood dreams forever!)

It was a big event in your household each year when the "Wizard of Oz" would come on TV. Your mom would break out the popcorn and sleeping bags!

You often asked your Magic-8 ball the question: "Who will I marry? Corey Haim, Sean Astin, or Ralph Macchio?"

You completely wore out your Grease, Saturday Night Fever, and Fame soundtrack record album. And Xanadu!

You tried to do lots of arts and crafts, like yarn and Popsicle-stick God's eyes, decoupage, or those weird potholders made on a plastic loom. My mom still has (somewhere) a macrame hanging plant holder. Sooo very 70s.

You made Shrinky-Dinks and those little colored crystal sun catcher ornaments.

You used to tape record songs off the radio by holding your portable tape player up to the speaker. Sometimes I recorded MTV, but aaaalways was there with my little recorder for Solid Gold! I still have a couple of those tapes, and it is funny to listen to them now because you can hear my dog Sugar barking in the background.

You had subscriptions to BOP and Tiger Beat.

You learned everything you needed to know about girl issues from Judy Blume books. Oh, and Where Did I Come From.

You thought Olivia Newton John's song "Physical" was actually about aerobics. I had a very religious friend and she and her mom took me to a record store for my birthday. I picked out ONJ's Physical album, and she said she wouldn't buy that one! That's the first time I ever realized it was about more than exercise. I had to start asking around at school to find out why it was so naughty!

You wore friendship pins on your tennis shoes, or shoelaces with heart or rainbow designs. I had a couple turtlenecks with hearts and rainbows on them too. And I wore cowboy boots with skirts before it was hot to do so. I was so not hot.

You wanted to be a Solid Gold dancer. Seriously. The one with the knee-length hair in fact. Is it too late?

* I deleted the statesments I thought were stupid (like having a crush on Gopher from Love Boat?!), and added a couple of my own. So if it's here, I did it, wore it, or loved it!

Risky situations

2006-02-23T21:20:00.000-06:00

I taught the 7th lesson of my 22-session cognitive skills class tonight. So far, the group has done very well - for the most part they pay attention and participate in discussions and do their assignments. It appears that things have been clicking up to this point.

But tonight, they just didn't get it. Last week we talked about identifying thoughts and feelings (mind you this is a group of youthful criminal offenders, not PhD candidates). Anyway, tonight's lesson was to follow up by identifying the RISK in those thoughts and feelings that have the potential to lead them into trouble.

The group had the hardest time grasping the idea of risk. They could pick out the most prominent thought or emotion, but they couldn't comprehend that some of those ideas, if followed through, would create additional problems in their already complicated lives!

I was really bothered by that. Have been worrying about it for the past couple hours -- what did I say wrong? what didn't I explain adequately? were my examples not clear? were they just not listening? ((how do you teachers do it?!!)) -- but I finally got it. If they were able to identify risk as well as the rest of us in the free world, they wouldn't have gone to jail in the first place! Okay. So we'll talk some more about risk next week, then start working on new thinking to replace the risky thinking. I have faith, I think they'll get it soon enough.

Book game, revisited

2006-02-21T13:45:00.000-06:00

Weird, weird, weird.

I had yesterday off for President's Day. I slept late, had pancakes and coffee for breakfast, and was glued to the tube watching re-runs of Project Runway all morning. For some reason, I felt like googling memes, but I couldn't find anything I liked. I remembered a book meme that I'd done back in the day. For some reason I couldn't find it on my blog search, but found plenty of links to it (it seemed to take on a life of it's own!!), and finally traced it back to last February, and would you guess, I'd posted it on President's Day exactly one year ago! Crazy!

Anyway, here it is again. No tagging. But it is yours to comment on or re-post on your blog as you please.

1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the next 3 sentences on your blog along with these instructions.
5. Don't you dare dig for that "cool" or "intellectual" book in your closet! I know you were thinking about it! Just pick up whatever is closest.

Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert T. Kiyosaki:
The price of the 30-unit apartment building in Phoenix was $875,000 with $225,000 down. The cash flow from the 30 units was a little over $5,000 a month. The Arizona market began moving up and, in 1996, a Colorado investor offered us $1.2 million for the property.

The braid makes you ... blegh!

2006-02-20T10:13:00.000-06:00

I'll spare you a picture on this post... for now*

I saw a commercial this weekend that both cracked me up and made me throw up in my mouth a little bit, all within the same 30 second clip.

Honestly I was so shocked, that I don't even recall the brand name of the product (so much for marketing!), but here's the slogan: THE BRAID MAKES YOUR BRAVE. Think on it a second. The Braid. Makes you Brave.

You may need a little assistance on this one, because honestly, it is a little vague without the visuals. But, the "braid" refers to, well, a tampon string. Yeah, seriously. This is a tampon commercial.

So evidently when a young lady wears this tampon with a pretty braid (vs the one with just a regular old non-braided cord) she magically transforms into a more confident, courageous, and adventurous woman. Fascinating.

* P.S. I did find some interesting pics I could post here, but I know not all of you, guys especially, have a strong stomach for this kind of thing... But if you are up for it... Click here, then 3rd from the bottom click on "The Thank God I Started Tampon". Man, oh man.

My cloud

2006-02-17T09:53:00.000-06:00

I found this fun little project on Darth's blog. You can experience the fun too!

Picture pages, picture pages

2006-02-15T20:40:00.000-06:00

This was my attempt at Valentine's Day on a budget. A good bottle of merlot from our favorite wine bar, La Diosa, and hand dipped chocolate covered oreos (with icing - baking clearly isn't my calling!)

And here is the gorgeous Valentine's bouquet that TBF had delivered to my office yesterday - stargazer lilies, some little purple lilies, mini white rose buds, snap dragons, carnations - all in pinks and purples, my favorite.

So while I was had the camera at my office today, I thought I'd snap a few more pics and share my 8-5 world with you guys...

The top poster reads:

SERENITY
Of all the gifts of creation,
Perhaps the greatest is the gift of Serenity.

On a lighter note, the bottom one (stolen from a 2005 calendar) reads:

PROCRASTINATION
Hard work often pays off over time,
But procrastination pays off now.

If you've somehow missed demotivators, you must check out this website asap. They are absolutely hilarious and so so true!

This is a handpainted angel that a co-worker made for a silent auction we had last Christmas. I know it's so cheesy, but she makes me smile! She faces my desk (my offenders don't have to look at her), and whenever things aren't going so well, I just take a few minutes, take a deep breath, and enjoy her simplicity... and that sexy heart tattoo on her leg! :)

I wonder what it says that I was the only bidder? And I got her for $5? Oh, shut it. I said she makes me smile!

This is my filing cabinet, the mirror where I do my eyeliner and mascara on most mornings (because I refuse to do mascara in the car, and lord knows I can't get up any earlier in the morning!), and my favorite plant.

I was given this ivy by a secret pal 4 years ago. And yes, it is not only still alive, but flourishing! But... my plant doesn't have a name. Does he/she need one?

Oh, and see the business card holder? It was made by a coworker's retired father - black iron star with a silver State of Texas medallion. Very cool.

And this is where things tend to get a little messy. Dell computer, phone, paperwork to be filed, coffee pot, kleenex, another calendar, a million lists, a zillion sticky notes, picture frames of loved ones, clock radio, oh, and another one of my favorite sayings:

DO
all the good you can ~
by all the ways you can,
in all the places you can
at all the times you can,
to all the people you can
as long as ever you can.
- John Wesley

Ahhh, the life of a probation officer. Now you know.

Angel crossing

2006-02-12T21:24:00.000-06:00

I freakin' LOVE Grey's Anatomy. I cried like three times tonight. I thought George sweet talking Dr Bailey into having the baby was the best. Love it.

---

I volunteered with our local crisis team last night, as I do one weekend night per month. It's a fun experience, riding around with another counselor in an unmarked cop car (no lights though) with the police computer and dispatch radios. Our purpose it to attend to crisis calls after the police take care of arrests etc - providing initial crisis counseling primarily for victims of domestic abuse, but also to family members after auto accidents, homicides or suicides, etc. Fortunately we don't have a ton of these kind of calls, so we spend a good deal of the night driving around town, and dropping in on any other calls that sound interesting or entertaining.

So last night about 12:30am we got a call about what sounded like a "woman in an angel costume" walking down the street. Really? A costume? This ain't October! We were only about 6 blocks away, so we headed that direction. And sure enough...

A pretty young woman stumbling toward an extremely busy intersection wearing flowy white pants, a white tank top, no shoes, and yes, white feathery angel wings. We drove behind her as she walked to try to avoid her getting splattered by the Saturday night traffic. The police cruisers showed up about 3 minutes later to question her.

Clearly, the girl was drunk, and she said she just needed a ride home (never got a chance to clarify from whence she came or exactly why she was barefoot and wearing an angel costume in the middle of February). I'm kinda sad that the rookie decided she had to go to jail last night for a PI.

Poor angel. I don't think it's very good karma to put an angel behind bars!

Blanket party

2006-02-11T14:06:00.000-06:00

It's a cold and windy Saturday morning, so we are having a blanket contest.

Can you guess who's winning?

I've added two new friends today. Check them out when you have a few minutes:

Musical Ramblings. He's a DJ from Tennessee who's current on the music biz, and is a master of all things American Idol (great episode synopses, he even does interviews with the contestants!). My hero.

The Doggy Did It. A fellow Texas gal (although not originally, we like her anyway!) with a hubby, a kiddo, and a great sense of humor.

Snappy day

2006-02-08T08:55:00.000-06:00

I woke up with this song in my head:

And I'll be back when the day is new,
and I'll have more ideas for you,
and you'll have things you want to talk about,
I will too.

Ah, good ol' Mister Rogers. I haven't seen him putting on his shoes and cardigan in ages, so I have no clue why this song popped into my head in the shower this morning, but there is was.

Wanna get another even peppier song stuck in your nogen today?
TRY THIS ONE.
Come on, sing it.
You know you want to.
You'll be snapping your fingers all day long!

Foot-blah

2006-02-05T14:51:00.000-06:00

Had enough football already? Me too. It's only 3:30, the Superbowl is still hours away, and I'm already growing weary of the big announcer voices, roaring crowds and 1980s pigskin flashbacks.

So for me, something a little more girly today, thank you very much.

A Wedding.

TBF and I have finished up our counseling, and we're happy and eager to be back on the wedding wagon. We thought we'd be living in Austin by now, but even though we finally finished up school, our jobs have kept us in Lubbock a little longer than planned. It is almost as hard to plan a long distance wedding in Austin as in any other town, and I don't have any interest in getting married in Lubbock, so we've been brainstorming other possible wedding destinations.

Currently under consideration is Ruidoso, New Mexico. We go there at least twice a year to get away, and have always enjoyed the town. There are mountains, but it isn't terribly cold or too far away from most of our friends (unlike Colorado). It is inexpensive (unlike Austin). Ruidoso has plenty of affordable lodging and restaurants, but still has a small town homey feel (unlike Vegas). Plus it's a town already familiar to us, not someplace we'd have to struggle with as far as finding the florist and the bakery.

So, a Ruidoso wedding, perhaps??

Scary sleep

2006-01-29T20:31:00.000-06:00

Last night I fell asleep reading on the couch, and the next thing I know I wake up in a complete panic. I can't move my arms or legs - I feel completely paralyzed. I know TBF is nearby but I can't get his attention. My heart was racing. I can barely breathe. I can't even open my eyes. I lay there motionless, desperately struggling to get his attention, to make a noise, to get help. I tried to scream, to even whisper, but not a sound would come out of my mouth. I was scared to death.

What seemed like an eternity later, probably only moments, I woke up. I heard myself yelp as I was coming out of my dream. My heart was still racing and I had to check all my limbs to make sure they really worked. What a weird dream. After my mini-scream, I had to explain to TBF what was going on. He asked me about some Freudian interpretation of being trapped, but I laughed it off.

I was reading A Million Little Pieces right before I fell asleep. I had just started the book, the character (who thanks to the Smoking Gun we now know is more a fictional mish-mash of experiences than a autobiographical memoir) had just arrived in treatment, was doped up on Diazepam and Librium, and couldn't even keep his ass in a lazy boy without dripping out of it. I was reading about him lying face down on the carpet, unable to move, but aware of what was going on around him... So I blamed the dream attack on the book.

But just for kicks, I looked up dream analysis and paralysis online, and found some very interesting stuff. Mind awake, body unable to move, plus hallucinations. Although in the Southern US people call the phenomenon the witch riding your back, I find the Chinese interpretation much more interesting: a spirit or ghost is sitting or lying on top of the individual while they were sleeping, causing the sleep paralysis. This is thought to be a minor body possession by the forces from the dead, and usually doesn't cause any harm to the victim.

Oooh. I hope that was the last sleep paralysis experience ever. Way too scary.

Midweek funny

2006-01-26T14:52:00.000-06:00

SUV BLACK BOXES

The National Transportation Safety Board recently divulged they had covertly funded a project with the U.S. auto makers for the past 5 years, whereby the auto makers were installing black box voice recorders in four-wheel drive pickup trucks and SUV's in an effort to determine the circumstances in the last 15 seconds before a fatal crash.

They were surprised to find in 41 of the 50 states the recorded last words of drivers in 61.2 percent of fatal crashes were, "Oh Shit!"

Only the states of Oklahoma, Nebraska, Missouri, Kansas, Arkansas, Alabama, Georgia, Texas, and North Dakota were different, where 89.3 percent of the final words were:

"Hold my beer, I'm gonna try somethin'."

Sunday night news

2006-01-22T20:45:00.000-06:00

Isn't it odd how when we have more to do, there is somehow more time in the day? More responsibilities, but we get so much more accomplished? Then when there isn't so much to do - well - nothing gets done?!

Just me?

Six months ago I was working, in grad school, interning, studying for comps AND still managed to find time to blog. And now?! Well, let's just say I'm not working near as hard and not getting much done. Oh well, I needed a break.

So what's been going on?

* I took my lovely fake nails off last weekend. I calculated that I might've spent upwards of $500 on them last year. High price to pay for beauty. Too high. So they are gone. And now I feel like I have man-hands with these short stubby nails.

* As much as I love American Idol, it is no longer my addiction. This season's can't-live-without-it-TV: Grey's Anatomy and My Name is Earl.

* Christmas was great. Spent it in Austin with TBF, my folks, and my grandmother. I got a gorgeous sparkly tennis bracelet from TBF, some more luggage from my parents, a cashmere sweater from TBF's mom, and some several bottles of wine and wine-related goodness from friends.

* I just finished reading Gregory Maguire's, Wicked. Despite the controversy, James Frey's A Million Little Pieces is next.

* We've seen Chronicles of Narnia (just as good as I remembered the book), Hostel (horrid - complete waste of my time and money), Walk The Line (I love Reese!), Brokeback Mountain (very enjoyable, Oscar-worthy!)

* I did the typical New Years stuff, without the written resolutions: joined the gym and set a budget.

* I turned 31. Maybe more on that later.

I haven't completely committed to sticking with the blogging thing, but I'll give it another whirl. At least once a week. Here goes, friends!

Credentials

2005-12-19T21:12:00.000-06:00

I've been a bit out of touch, okay waaaay out of touch. So sorry!

BUT this is what I've been up to: GETTING MY MASTER'S DEGREE!! After less than 2 1/2 years I completed 48-hours of Community Counseling courses and 700 hours of practicum and internship, while working full time.

Friday night we went to a Pinning and Medallion ceremony at the Merket Alumni Center where the friends and family of the graduates were honored and we were presented with a COE medallion to also wear at graduation. After that we went to Cafe J's to celebrate with a Fuzzytini and a couple bottles of merlot.

Graduation was Saturday. I was so proud to wear my medallion and my honor cords to the ceremony (I guarantee it was a miracle I got through undergrad, and I certainly never excelled!). I've come a long way! TBF, my parents, and my grandmother were there to celebrate with me - we ate at Texas Roadhouse afterwards (best prime rib in the universe!), went to Holland Gardens (an amazing local Christmas store) and Target, then home to open a couple presents. TBF got me one of the fantastic diploma frames, and my folks got me a great ivy green TravelPro luggage. Love it!

Today I changed my work email signature to:
Texas Biscuit, M.Ed.
How awesome is that?!! And soon to have an LPC (Licensed Professional Counselor) to follow that.

The craziest part about the whole thing is how fast the past couple years went by. If I'd decided that getting my master's was too hard or too time-consuming or whatever, I would've been stuck at the same job with the same credentials and the same experience. And now, here I am, time passing either way, and I have a master's degree. It wasn't easy, but it sure was worth it.

I'm HOT!

2005-12-06T22:17:00.000-06:00

So things have been going well, nothing out of the ordinary, nothing particularly exciting to post about this week (oh, and have been sick, making everything a little "less than"). Anyhoodle, tonight after work TBF and I went to my fave Chinese buffet (excellent peppered shrimp) then headed to Blockbuster to rent movies. And now, something has got me hot enough that I just have to rant!

Came home with 3 new rentals: War of the Worlds (I'm not the hugest Tom Cruise fan since all the Katie Holmes craziness, but want to see it anyway), Saw (never seen it, didn't see part II either), and My Date with Drew (a documentary about this guy who wants to meet Drew Barrymore, never heard of it, but I love Drew too, so how bad could it be?!).

We started with Saw - pretty cool idea for a movie. TBF just told me that the producer just died this week - went to the hospital with neck pain - and just died! Anyway, we were really into the movie - right after the little girl went to tell her doctor father that there was a man in her bedroom. AND THE DVD FROZE UP! Everything was at a stand still. Then went to a black screen. And got some horrid message about the menu or the button or some crap. It wouldn't pick up where it left off, had to go back to the main menu then scroll through the chapter selections to figure out where we left off. Did this twice, and it kept jamming up at the same point. Ugh. Used some CD/DVD cleaner - no help - the disc was a mess, completely scratched up. But I couldn't bear to get this far and give up!

((This movie has been out for ages, surely I don't have to warn you about spoilers?!!))

So we had to skip the rest of that chapter and jump to the next one. I got over it shortly as we were sucked into the plot as the detectives uncovered that scary ass clown mask and the live guy with the screws to his head. We carried on - I was on the edge of my seat, clutching my knees to my chest - the doctor sawed off his leg, promised to return with help for Adam - then the "dead" man lying in the puddle of blood struggled to his knees, and began pulling his plastic face off, and - HOLY CRAP! At that very moment, the damn thing froze up again. Dead. Black. No picture, no sound, literally seconds before the movie ends. ARGGGHHHHH!!

I am so pissed. I know it isn't Blockbuster's fault - so why do people treat rental DVDs so badly? Do you really have to play frisbee with you rented DVDs? Is it necessary to let your 4-year old chew on then? Must you drop them in the gravel AND run over it before you return it to the store?! Seriously - THIS is why we own so many DVDs that we only watch a couple of times. At least we can get through the whole thing uninterrupted.

AND thank goodness for Ruined Endings - you kept me from running up to Blockbuster in my PJs and throwing that damn DVD through their damn window!

Give thanks!

2005-11-22T21:57:00.000-06:00

I know many of us have our share of worries, problems, or irritations that we face from day to day, however we also have a mountain of blessings that we enjoy. We have the security to walk down the street and not have to worry about a suicide bomber trying to murder us, thinking he is about to go to heaven and make babies with 72 virgins. We can take a drink of water and not worry about contracting a bacterial disease. We can leave work and know that we will not have to fight the elements to stay warm tonight because we will have a roof over our head.

And hopefully we will all be able to enjoy a long weekend with good friends, good wine, and piles and piles of homemade smashed potatos. I'll be doing so with TBF's sisters in Dallas.

I hope you all have a blessed Thanksgiving holiday. On Thursday night I will be giving thanks for all of you and wishing you another year of health, prosperity, and happiness.

I enjoyed this and wanted to pass it along:

A boat docked in a tiny Mexican village. An American tourist complimented the Mexican fisherman on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took him to catch them.

"Not very long," answered the Mexican.

"But then, why didn't you stay out longer and catch more?" asked the American.

The Mexican explained that his small catch was sufficient to meet his needs and those of his family.

The American asked, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?"

"I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, and take a siesta with my wife. In the evenings, I go into the village to see my friends, play the guitar, and sing a few songs... I have a full life."

The American interrupted, "I have an MBA from Harvard, and I can help you! You should start by fishing longer every day. You can then sell the extra fish you catch. With the extra revenue, you can buy a bigger boat."

"And after that?" asked the Mexican.

"With the extra money the larger boat will bring, you can buy a second one and a third one and so on until you have an entire fleet of trawlers. Instead of selling your fish to a middle man, you can then negotiate directly with the processing plants and maybe even open your own plant. You can then leave this little village and move to Mexico City, Los Angeles, or even New York City! From there you can direct your huge new enterprise."

"How long would that take?" asked the Mexican.

"Twenty, perhaps twenty-five years," replied the American.

"And after that?"

"Afterwards? Well my Friend, That's when it gets really interesting," answered the American, laughing. "When your business gets really big, you can start selling stocks and make millions!"

"Millions? Really? And after that?" said the Mexican.

"After that you'll be able to retire, live in a tiny village near the coast, sleep late, play with your children, catch a few fish, take a siesta with your wife and spend your evenings doing what you like and enjoying your friends."

And the moral is:
Know where you're going in life ...
you may already be there.

~Author Unknown~

3 things

2005-11-19T12:35:00.000-06:00

I was going back through old drafts tonight, looking for a mindless meme to post. I copied this one from Glitzy back in June! With slight modifications, here are my 3 things:

3 THINGS I AM WEARING
1. jeans
2. fuzzy socks
3. engagement ring

3 SONGS ON iTUNES "PARTY SHUFFLE"
1.That Smell - Lynard Skynard
2. Luka - Suzanne Vega
3. Keep Yourself Alive - Queen

3 THINGS I CAN SEE
1. Cajun dreaming - I think he's chasing a rabbit!
2. a totally mediocre SNL
3. a dusty mantle

3 THINGS I ATE IN THE LAST 24 HOURS
1. cream of chicken soup
2. strawberry jello
3. scrambled eggs

3 THINGS I PURCHASED THIS WEEK
1. black turtleneck (thank you, Gap)
2. pre-lighted Christmas tree (thank you, Target)
3. $1700 worth of oral surgery (thank you, Citibank)

3 THINGS I DID SO FAR TODAY
1. dropped off teddy bears at the museum for annual holiday display
2. took a handful of Hydrocodone
3. fell asleep while watching Cops

3 THINGS I'M PLANNING FOR NEXT WEEK
1. five days worth of work squished into three days
2. trip to Dallas to spend Thanksgiving with TBF's sisters
3. getting rejection visit from my boss for job I interviewed for last week

3 UNWATCHED MOVIES ON MY TIVO'S "NOW PLAYING" LIST
1. Spanglish
2. Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind
3. Charlotte's Web

No tagging from me - copy it if ya wanna.

Busy little bee

2005-11-14T13:15:00.000-06:00

What a busy couple of weeks! Quick update:

New computer software at work. It was developed just for us by a local company, and was supposed to be ready to start beta testing on August 1st. Uh, no. We didn't get it installed until 10/31, the same day the contract for our old corrections software package was terminated. Fortunately there was no apparent data loss, but there are soooo many bugs and problems, it's ridiculous. My fave IT guy said it would likely be 3-6 months until everything is up and running as it should be. Trying my best to be p a t i e n t.

Went to Ruidoso last weekend and TBF and I did some early Christmas shopping. Our favorite Italian joint, Michelinas, was closed for remodeling though, so we didn't get to gorge on pizza, pasta, and wine as planned. However we still managed to get drunk and watch Texas Tech beat up on A&M at Farley's. Go Tech!

This Saturday, I worked (volunteered) my first crisis team shift for the local police department. We go out in pairs in an unmarked car, monitor the police radio and computer and go out on calls where we can be of assistance to the victim or their family - generally crisis counseling after a domestic disturbance, but also homocide, suicide, kiddnapping, etc. This weekend there was actually a kidnapping on Friday night that turned into a homocide investigation by Saturday morning. Very interesting stuff.

This morning I met with the atty my insurance company hired to represent me after a car accident from March. The plaintiff dismissed the case a few months ago, and I thought I was in the clear, but they've since re-filed. Blegh. I've given all the appropriate statements, turned over documents and pictures, and should be called to give a deposition in a month or so. If it isn't settled earlier, the trial will be scheduled for December 2006!! Just a motherly reminder - pay those insurance premiums!

On Wednesday I will interview for a brand new counseling position within the probation department. I don't have any expectation of being offered the position as I am not yet licensed and won't even graduate for another month, but I do have tons of probation experience and counseling internship hours through the drug court and the women's shelter, so we'll see. Best case scenario: I get the new position and an enormous raise. Worst case scenario: It was a great interview experience.

And on Friday morning - dum duh dum dum - to the oral surgeon to get all four wisdom teeth removed. I will have a swollen drooling bloody face five days from now. Pretty imagery. Well, at least it's a day off, and a good excuse to be babied, eat jello, and lay on the couch. Oh, and did someone mention Lortab?

Fwd: Mathematics

2005-11-07T06:37:00.000-06:00

MATHEMATICS
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.

GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.

DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

Trick or Treat

2005-10-31T11:31:00.000-06:00

No, this isn't my cat, but my Cajun would be equally pissed if I shoved his fat gut into a ballet tutu or made him walk around the house in anything pink and lacy.

I'm taking today off work - I went to the oral surgeon this morning (initial consult only - will get all four wisdom teeth "dug out of my head" per Vegasgustan's terminology, in two weeks), got my nails done, did a couple of errands. I should be cleaning or doing laundry or something, but for now I'm just relaxing on the couch.

But tonight, ooooo, tonight will be scary. My counseling class is going on a site visit today to Montford Unit in Lubbock. Not just a prison, but a PSYCHIATRIC prison!! This is so "Jason" in Halloween - it was mostly coincidence that we decided to schedule the visit for today, but I can just picture all the escaped prisoners wondering around in the field in the rain when we drive up to the unit. Can't wait!

I hope you and your kiddos and kitties have a Happy Halloween!

Woo hoo!! I passed!!

2005-10-28T21:29:00.000-05:00

I'm LOST

2005-10-26T21:16:00.000-05:00

I am lost. I didn't watch ABC's Lost last season, in fact, I never really heard that much about it. I got the impression it had kind of a Star Trek kinda sci fi following, but thought it was going to be a single season fly by night show. So it was odd when TBF and I came home the same day last week talking about it. Hype on CNN and local radio, I guess.

Anyway, we TiVo'd it and watched it last week. I was confused about what was going on, so read a couple of message boards to get caught up, but they seemed like they were written by 15-year olds. I decided I'd figure it out soon enough.

Then we watched again tonight, and if I'm not mistaken, tonight's episode was previous to last week's. I know these are re-runs, but why? And why in reverse order? I realize there are supposed to be lots of twists and surprises, but I feel like I may have to give up before I figure out what is going on. I've read several message boards, episode synopsis, and character descriptions, but I still feel like I'm behind.

So far all I know from the past 2 weeks is Walt was kidnapped, then his dad, Sawyer, and the Korean guy went to find him in the jungle. I saw the hatch, and the guy with the gun (what's up with the ancient Apple and the counter reset?), and the mysterious symbol. I saw the teddy bear and the legs of "the others". Am I supposed to know yet about the different groups of people in the island and from whence they come? Anyone know if a good site to catch me up, or want to offer some highlights from last season and whatever we've missed thus far this season?

Esteem outfits

2005-10-24T00:32:00.000-05:00

Do you ever have one of those days when you just don't feel good in your clothes? Your skirt is a little too short, top a little too snug, shoes are scuffed, sleeves too long? You pull and tug and rearrange, but always seem to be thinking about your clothes. You just don't feel good. Presentations don't go well. You snap at coworkers. I'm CONVINCED it's all about the outfit.

It's your low self esteem outfit. ((By the way, this pic of the ugly Duff sister, how could she possibly be smiling in this outfit?! It's horrid!!))

On the flip side, you may feel fantastic in a new suit - the one that is altered to fit, hemmed just the right length, not worn at the knees or too tight in the butt. You walk with your head held high and you look people in the eye. People treat you with just a little more respect - or so it seems. Thus, the high self esteem outfit.

I'm trying to talk myself into getting rid of my low self esteem clothes. But I have two problems:
1) I'm a bit of a packrat and constantly think, "oh, this will look so cute with (fill in blank here with something I either don't own or have no occasion to wear)"
2) I really love the idea of an overflowing closet. Tons of shoes, loads of sweaters and jeans, racks of tops, rows of suits.

Sadly though, most of those rows of clothes have been hanging there for months because they never come off the rack. All the clothes I do wear are thrown on the nightstand or on the bathroom counter. What a wreck. I know I would be much happier and more pulled together if I have just a few FANTASTIC outfits, and ditched all these half ass clothes that don't really fit or look too dated or have a hole in the pit or a stain on the sleeve. As of yet, I haven't been able to do this. But I'm tired of not feeling good in my clothes. Yeah, yeah, maybe it's more about the mind and the body underneath the clothes. I'll address that at some point too. But not today. One thing at a time. Today... wardrobe. But where to begin??

Get your guns up!

2005-10-21T18:30:00.000-05:00

In honor of the upcoming TTU vs UT Big XII football game on Saturday, here's a bit of a college forward I recieved this week. If you are familiar with either of these towns or schools, you'll love these:

TEXAS TECH UNIVERSITY

I live on a piece of dirt so flat that we call the four degree incline at the intersection of 19th and Brownfield "the Big Hill". I get dirt in my eyes, hair, and teeth when I walk to class. I can out drink anyone from any other school because that is what we do best. If I'm not drunk by 4:30pm, I'm high. I can't buy beer within 50 miles of where I live - so I trek to the strip, which my friends and I all consider a true paradise on Earth. I don't go to many football games. I don't go to any organizational meetings. I don't really go to anything. Not even class. I like the fact that Will Rogers' horse's ass points to College Station. I fry cow balls. I know where Buddy Holly used to live. I am desperately trying to find a rival within our conference to make fun of. Our football players get caught by the NCAA. If I'm not drunk by 4:30pm, I'm high. But I'm usually drunk by 4:30pm. Or I'm high. And what the hell is that smell?

I AM A RED RAIDER

UNIVERSITY OF TEXAS

I live in a town where you stand out if you don't have a purple Mohawk, facial piercing chained to nipple piercing, a homosexual lover, or hang out at the Magnolia Cafe. More people go to my school than live in Australia. I honestly believe that Ricky Williams is a god. I also really hate Cody Hodges. I am open-minded and spiritually in tune - except towards people who are closed minded and spiritually out of tune. Liberal women with armpit hair are cool. You can see my dorm from Chicago for it is as tall as Florida would be if it stood up. I protest everything - except protests. I am a gold card carrying member of Amnesty International. I am openly bi-curious.

I AM A LONGHORN

Firestone sucks balls

2005-10-19T19:29:00.000-05:00

I was looking for a jpg Firestone logo with a big red circle and line through it, but couldn't find one, so please picture that here.
<------------ Firestone is on my shitlist. I had a near-rip-off experience with them a couple of months ago, but luckily I was able to avoid the complete jack.* Why I decided to tow the car there again last night I am not completely sure - habit I guess, a "reputable" repair shop close to home in a decent neighborhood where I could leave the car overnight. Around noon, Firestone called me with an estimate. New distributor assembly and ignition ignitor. Get ready for this. Are you sitting down? Parts and labor: $826.98. HOLY F!!

About 15 minutes later I snapped out of the financial-induced stupor, and I called around for some other estimates. Not surprisingly no one else was quoting near this much. In fact all the bids were UNDER $500. A $325 markup?! Amazing. I'm not sure why I feel compelled to add this, but Firestone is not entirely without merit: their employees are incredibly friendly. So I had no qualms telling their smiling faces why I felt screwed, again. And even after getting that off my chest, I am still pretty damn bitter that I had to pay the $79 diagnostic fee even though they didn't do a drop of work on the car. Ugh.

Okay, so a few hours later this story has a happy ending since I was able to get my baby back in working order before 6pm, so I'm back in business again (not that I wasn't looking for an excuse to miss work tomorrow, but that is another story). And the best part is I have a new auto mechanic: Sexton Automotive. They rock. Firestone, on the other hand? I will never set foot in their establishment again. And unless you have more money than Steve Jobs, I would like to warn you against giving them your business.**

*A very similar story with a very similar ending. Slow learner, I know.
** Do you know how much I want to marry into a family with a mechanic?! A doctor, lawyer, and plumber would be nice to have in this ideal family as well, but above all, a mechanic. Please.

AAA

2005-10-18T23:51:00.000-05:00

I spent a good part of my day planning this post - mentally documenting each moment of my sucky day so that I could share with you each crappy part of it.

But then, come 6pm, it started getting better - I finally got home, took a hot shower, had a glass of chardonnay, went to Best Buy and had a wonderful evening with TBF over fajitas at Chilis with TBF, then on the way home...

...the car died. Died dead. It started up out of the parking lot just fine like it always does, we drove about 100 yards, and it just died. Dead. I know, I already said that, but it is still a shock. It seemed to have plenty of power but just wouldn't turn over. Had enough gas. No warning lights. Everything checked out. The tow truck idiot said it was probably a fuel filter. Fudge. He towed the car to a local shop then took us home. I still stink like b.o. from his stupid smelly tow truck. BUT, the good news is we made it home in one piece at a decent hour. There is money in the bank for repairs. We didn't miss work, class, or any appointments. And now, here I am blogging about it within the hour. Thank goodness for my AAA membership that doesn't expire until Nov 2.

It's over!

2005-10-17T22:12:00.000-05:00

What a relief! Last Saturday morning I took my comps. I've never prepared so much in my life for any event - and particularly not for an exam. I am a VERY last minute kinda gal. I rarely begin any project more than 48-hours in advance, usually just the night before. But for this test, believe it or not, I actually started studying 6 weeks ago. SIX WEEKS! I ordered some pricey review materials, and read and read and read. I woke up early and read. I read and went to bed late. I spent dozens of hours studying at Starbucks over triple venti lattes. I read during lunch. I read in between meetings. I even turned down numerous drinking opportunities to read. It was nuts. I can't even believe it now.

Anywhoodle, I took my test last week and it went pretty smoothly. Oddly, I almost wished the test was longer because there was so much information I'd learned that wasn't on the test! Of course there were some questions I had to just guess on also, but for the most part, I felt like I did really well. AND more importantly, I'm expecting a congratulatory letter in the mail around Nov 1 which will permit me to graduate in December. And be out of school FOREVER! The downside that I'm refusing to think about is that if by chance I don't pass, I can retake the test. However, I have to be enrolled in a grad class to take it, which means more worthless tuition and fees, and pushing back graduation until May 2006. Ugh. Hopefully that isn't anything I'll have to worry about!

So, hopefully in two weeks, congratulations will be in order. But for now, it's just time to be getting back into the swing of things. And no more studying!!

Mew

2005-10-03T00:08:00.000-05:00

Puuurdy.
I'm still working, interning, volunterring, and studying.
6 days till the biggest test of my life... Will return soon!
Hope you are all well!

Mental hospital hotline

2005-09-25T13:26:00.000-05:00

Fortunately, the horror that was Hurricane Rita has passed and left Texas relatively unscathed. But poor Louisiana just can't catch a break... I've studied all weekend - stayed in my PJs and didn't set foot out of the house until late this afternoon - but I feel pretty good about the comps with only 2 weeks remaining. And on the subject of mental health, I got this forward this week, and thought it was too funny not to share:

Hello, and welcome to the mental hospital hotline.......

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5, and 6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mother ship.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are a manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer.

If you are dyslexic, press 969696969696969696.

If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the pound key until a representative comes on the line.

If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, telephone number and mothers maiden name.

If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, s-l-o-w-l-y & c-a-r-e-f-u-l-l-y press 000.

If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9.

If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. All operators are too busy to talk to YOU.

If you are menopausal, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down & cry. You won't be crazy forever.

If you are blonde don't press any buttons, you'll just mess it up.

Back off Rita!

2005-09-22T06:40:00.000-05:00

Texas doesn't want you, Rita!

Evidently these storm pics that have been flying around the internet post-Katrina were neither taken in Mississippi, nor are they even pics of a hurricane. Nonetheless they are pretty scary. This Hurricane Rita is one bitch of a storm also, and it appears she is going to wreck havoc on the Lone Star state. All I can say is that at least people are taking preparations seriously after Katrina - not only are well do to evacuees getting out of town, but it appears that public transportation is also being provided for those who don't have cars etc. Our old AFB has been set up to house 800 evacuees from the coast.

I emailed some old friends from high school (I graduated in Corpus) and college that live on the coast and let them know they have a friend in Lubbock if they need shelter, etc. Although I'd hate to hear from them due to any tragedy in their own lives, it would be good to see them.

I went to a fantastic domestic violence seminar on Tue/Wed. I'll share some of that info later this week. Today I'm back at work and trying to get caught up after missing two days of phone calls and emails. Back to work...

Scrum recipe ahead

2005-09-21T06:18:00.000-05:00

TBF was sick this week, so instead of traditional (i.e. boring and bland) chicken soup, I decided to try something new - a spicy alternative (you can tell *I* wasn't the sick one!). It was scrumalicious! Using canned veggies and pre-cooked chicken, you can be from kitchen to dinner table in 20-25 mins. Easy! Serves 4. Here's the recipe (as adapted from FoodTV.com - I can never make a recipe exactly, just gotta make some changes)...

Spicy Chicken Tortilla Soup

2 T vegetable oil
1 medium onion, chopped
1 chipotle in adobo sauce, minced *
1 T chili powder
1 T garlic powder (or use the real thing, I was out)
2 t kosher salt
6 c low sodium chicken broth (3 cans) - I used the broth w/ roasted garlic
1 c corn kernels - use fresh if you've got it, I used canned, I'm lazy that way
1 can Rotel tomatoes - again fresh tom if you wanna, I live for Rotel though
2 c cooked chicken - I used pre-cooked grilled "fajita style" from the freezer section
1/2 c fresh cilantro leaves, chopped
1/2 c freshly squeezed lime juice
About 2 dozen corn tortilla chips, broken
1 small avocado, sliced (optional)
lime wedges (optional)

Heat oil in a large saucepan over medium heat. Add the onions, chipotle, chili powder, garlic powder, and salt and cook until the onions become translucent, about 5 minutes.

Add the chicken broth, bring to a boil, reduce heat slightly, and simmer uncovered for about 10 minutes.

Add the corn and simmer for another 5 minutes.

Remove the saucepan from the heat and stir in the tomato, chicken, cilantro, and lime juice just before serving. Divide the tortilla chips among 4 warmed bowls, ladle the soup on top, and serve with lime wedges and avocado slices if desired.

Yum YUM! This was just as good re-heated the 2nd day, but if you plan to serve leftovers, I'd hold off on the cilantro until just before serving so it doesn't get wilted.

* WARNING: this means one chipotle pepper, not one can of chipotles!! These puppies are hot! Add more to your liking, but 1 pepper and an extra dab of the sauce was plenty for us, and I like spice!

** Fajita, Chipotle, and Tortilla are not in blogger's spelling check. Stupid.

18 days

2005-09-20T06:52:00.000-05:00

Between work, class, and my internship site, I've been spending all my "free" time with this guy: Howard Rosenthal and his Encyclopedia of Counseling. I have studied (learned?) 742 of the 1000 multiple choice questions (w/ explanations), and have listened to 7 of the 18 review CDs. My comprehensive exam is now 18 days away. If you are the praying type, add my name to your list! At least 75% correct = turning that tassle and walking across the stage in December!

And speaking of praying, most of the computer models are predicting that stupid Rita is headed towards Texas. Ugh.

More nano news

2005-09-19T13:08:00.000-05:00

Last Saturday I had a ton of things on my to-do list. I didn't complete hardly any of them (stupid hangover), but on a whim TBF and I stopped by CompUSA to check out the newest iPod nano that all the cool kids were buzzing about.

The sales guy initially said they wouldn't get any in until Monday or Tuesday, and I was a little disappointed because I really wanted to see how small it was. But he came out with his manager a couple minutes later with 4 little black boxes in his hand. My guess is other employees had these on hold until payday or something, but his conscious got the best of him, and he decided to share with us piddling customers.

So he took the nano out of the box, and OMG, it was so freaking tiny and delicate. I treated it like a newborn - I was almost afraid to take the little nano baby from him. But I did. And I hate to admit I'm such an easy sale, but the moment I held it, I was hooked. I told him I'd have to think about it, and handed it back over the sales guy, but within about 2.7 minutes I decided that it was going to be mine!

They only had the white ones in stock, and I decided to go for the cheaper 2 gig (I still have my massive 20 gig for all the tunes, documents, and pics I can stand). And it is fabulous.

The charger for the old iPod (w/ dock) works, but none of the rest of the accessories do. Namely, the AirPlay which allowed me to listed to my iPod over the radio frequency at work. But no biggie, I'm sure it won't be more than a month until there are loads of accessories available.

It's tiny, but tough. Same great click wheel (although is a little sensitive at times). The color screen is fantastic - I love having my fave pics with me to show off to friends. I added pics of the artist or playlist theme to all my playlists (instead of trying to find the art from each individual album, who has the time?!). Still using my old Sony headphones which are a million times better than the crappy ear buds that are still sold with the iPod products. I found the perfect carrying case by Mosh i - this super soft drawstring pouch made for the iPod mini is just the right size for the nano and has an outside pocket to carry headphones (or room for DL and credit card for trips to the gym, etc).

My recommendation? If you already have loads of songs on your iTunes (I have about 2800 songs now), it's kinda hard to narrow down which playlists and podcasts to put on the 2 gig nano, but if you plan to use the nano just for the gym or going to class or on a flight or while studying ... oh wait ... no matter what you do, it is freaking sweet. Almost too cool for words. Get it. Or add it on your Christmas list. Fabulous.

Nano nano

2005-09-13T10:14:00.000-05:00

absurdly tiny.
ridiculously slim.
unbearably sexy.
and it's entirely mine.

i just knew that one last semester in grad school was going to have its advantages! :)

Hot air balloon festival

2005-09-12T06:10:00.000-05:00

Our own little Lubbock sponsored the South Plains Balloon Roundup this weekend. It wasn't on the same scale as the festival in Albuquerque, but is was pretty wonderful nonetheless. It was a cool and calm morning - unusual for Lubbock - but we enjoyed a lovely sunrise, light winds, and about two dozen colorful balloons from around the area.

If you haven't ever been to a balloon fest, I'd highly recommend the Albuquerque International Balloon Fiesta this fall. It is absolutely mind blowing. You'll need to plan to show up before 6am for the Dawn Patrol (about a dozen balloons take off and fly until it gets light enough to find a landing spot), the Mass Ascention (literally hundreds of colorful balloon from around the globe - incredible), and if you can afford it, spring for a ride for you and your loved one. We haven't been up yet, but that is on my as yet unpublished top 50 things I want to do before I die. One more recommendation: check out Zinc wine bar in Albuquerque - now that is a dining experience. We've been raving about it for a year and can't wait to go back.

Here - enjoy a few pics from yesterday. My favorite is the last one - Tech's red & black double-T balloon.

Friday night

2005-09-10T03:00:00.000-05:00

First of all, is this not one of the coolest pics ever?

1) I am drunk at 3:14am. Listening to the Boogie Nights Soundtrack. LOVE.IT. Currently: Beach Boys, God Only Knows. Sweeeeeett.

2) TBF is on the horn with his best friend in Dallas who is going through some bull shit with his wife. I mean, I thought we had some probs, but it is nothing like what they are going through. I love these guys, but really, I can't imagine dealing with the shit they are going through 24 hours a day for the next 70 years. Man. I love me some counseling...

3) Okay, why did I pick this pic and start writing tonight (besides the Sierra Vevada Pale Ale in my lap, the Cuervo shots, and the nth bourbon and diets in my tummy) is the thought of one of my newest offenders: a sweet-faced, pale-headed kid who told me that his drug of choice is OTC drugs. Upon further exploration I discovered that he loved him some Dramamine. He admitted that he kept upping his, uh, dosage to get high, but at his height, he swallowed TEN bottles of Dramamine (12 pills per bottle) in one night. He said he had some absolutely incredible hallucinations, which I'm sure he did ... up until he had a heart attack. At 22 years old. Holy shit. He said he hasn't used (except weed) since then. I hope that he can stay on my caseload, stay sober, work his recovery, avoid any more ODs, and if anything, get back to the pot to hold onto his shit once he gets off probation.

Funny, hearing this from me - the drunk one - talking about recovery, eh? Tommorow's plan (after changing the UA color at 7am - bleh) is to "sleep in" til 9, get my new car stereo installed at 10, go the Cowboy Symposium luncheon at noon (chuckwagon biscuits and gravy!), see any movie that serves popcorn with extra butter (my current recomendation is The Exorcism of Emily Rose - anyone seen it?), take a fat nap, eat some mega-mexian food (Rosas or Casa Ole) for dinner, do some internship hours at the shelter in the evening ... and just to completely rock my world, head out to the shelter where the Katrina survivors are staying for a big kick in the butt to get my priorities straight!

Well, quite a day ahead. Hope you are all doing well. Hugs! - (drunken) TB

Internship

2005-09-06T08:26:00.000-05:00

Okay. So I'm graduating in December with my MA in counseling. I've completed almost all of my classes and coursework. I only have a couple of itsy bitsy little requirements remaining: my last 3-hour class, 300 hours of internship at the local women's shelter, and my "comps" - a comprehensive exam that covers the past two years of study. All this in addition to my regular 40-hour work week, the class I'm teaching for the drug court participants, couples counseling for us, and some hope for a social life!

In an effort to inform TBF and my parents when they might get a chance to see or talk to me during the next four months, this is what I came up with (*).

*Update: I had the dreadful details of my daily schedule listed here, but last night I had some stupid dream about a stalker, and thought, hmmm, maybe I don't need to tell the locals (my probationers?!) exactly where I'll be every hour of the day. So let's suffice it to say that I'll be out and about at work, school, and my internship site from 8am to 9pm almost every day of the week! Whew!

Bueller?

2005-09-05T19:48:00.000-05:00

Welp, I'm officially a teacher now ... a "facilitator" to be more exact. I went to a 4-day training in Austin several months ago. The training was a little rough - I'm not really one for skits and role-play, of which we did loads. But I got certified. We finally got off our tushes and decided on class dates and got a full class of 10 registered. The first session was last Thursday. I was actually surprised (and hugely relieved!) at how well it went. I was fortunate enough to already know all of the participants, which made me a little more comfortable in front of the group. I'll be facilitating with a co-worker on Thursdays and with the director of the department on Sundays! As if I wasn't nervous enough already! So we'll be meeting twice a week for the next 11 weeks, and in the mean time I'll be getting about 60 internship hours out of the way. My last internship... ugh... a whole new story for tomorrow.

2005-09-01T06:20:00.000-05:00

I just heard that the bussing from the Superdome to the Astrodome was suspended this morning because some dummass was shooting at one of the rescue helicopters! C'mon people! The baby above is only 4 days old. Can you imagine not only being homeless, having no transportation, very little food and water, perhaps no husband or family, and now a newborn with no diapers or formula?!! The conditions are just shocking. I can't even begin to imagine their despair.

I made my Red Cross donation this morning. And hopefully if I can get off work early tomorrow I'll be donating my loverly blood at UBS.

I'm up early this morning - 5:45! - as I will be every Mon-Fri in September. I'm the lucky winner of the month who gets to update the "UA* color line". Never heard of such a thing? Well a small percentage of the folks who are on felony probation - generally for drug and alcohol offenses or relapses after treastment - are supervised on a specialized caseload in which they have to submit random UAs (generally between once and three times per month). Each morning before 6am, an officer changes the pre-selected color on a voice mail. The offenders then call the color line at 6am, and if it's their assigned color, they have to report that morning between 8-8:30am for a UA. And walla - random drug testing!

At least being up super-early has some advantages. Today, blogging. Perhaps tomorrow, treatmill?

*UA = urinalysis = pee in a cup and we'll test it to see if you have any drugs or alcohol in your system.

Breakup (?) update

2005-08-30T11:51:00.000-05:00

I can't believe it's been so long since I've posted. My apologies! And again, thank you soooo much for all your kind comments and emails. They have helped me through some tough days. :)

So here is what is new with me and TB"F": Neither of us moved out of the apartment the week of the breakup, which turned out to be a good thing. It didn't take long for the anger to pass and the sadness and regret to set in, and we started talking again - about the good and the bad things - about where we went wrong and what could be improved upon.

He suggested that we give couples counseling a whirl before just throwing away the past 6 years of our lives together (the 6-year anniversary of our first date was about a week after the break up - can you believe HE remembered the date?!). At the time I figured at the very least counseling would bring resolution to the relationship and maybe give us some pointers and skills for moving on. What could we lose?

So last night we attended our 3rd session with a pretty good marriage and family therapist. And... I'm completely amazed how far we've come.

During the past 3 weeks not only have we disected the conversation that led to the actual un-engagement (and how I "heard" something completely different than what he "said" that night), but we've also openly addressed our pattern of dysfunctional communication. We've developed a list of mutual "fighting rules", and were able to put them into practice this week (OMG - they worked! A pretty serious incident that normally would have sent us on an I'm-pretending-that-you-are-a-total-stranger spree for 3 days was resolved -happily!- in half an hour). And we are continuing to work on a list of expectations for the relationship (communication, home, employment, sex, children, finances, spiritual, leisure etc).

Again, I am just shocked at how much more optimistic I feel after only a few weeks. I'm not 100% re-committed to the relationship just yet - the engagement ring is still in the jewelry box, I've scouted out some new apartments, and am considering a new position that wouldn't have been available if we moved to Austin in December in planned - however, that being said, things are definitely looking up.

Thanks again for your support. And for all those incredible heartache songs. My iPod loves you all. And if anyone ever needs to wallow in some painful songs (and I hope that you don't!), boy, do I ever have the ultimate playlist.

I like you

2005-08-19T08:35:00.000-05:00

Hi all. Thanks for your continued thoughts, concerns, and well wishes. It means the world to me. Basically, TBF and I called off the engagement last Monday, and we've been struggling with that for the past 10 days. But I'm doing pretty good now.
I'll write a longer post with a few more details later this weekend.

But for now, a little message for all you wonderfully supportive folks out there:

I LIKE YOU!

Top 5 heartache songs

2005-08-09T01:49:00.000-05:00

In honor of John Cusak's High Fidelity, please give me your top 5 (or 3? or 1?) breakup / heart ache/ heart break songs of all time.

Please.

Darth, Vegusgustan, Arethusa, SaltWindFire, and Ian - my music muses - I'm looking at you guys for an immediate painful response. I've been listening to Azure Ray, Antony & the Johnsons, Jennifer Nettles, U2, Police, Barry Manilow, Nirvana, country shit all night. But I need a little bit more. A heartache mix from my friends. More background info on why soon, I promise.

Poor piggy

2005-08-08T12:08:00.000-05:00

This is what my piggy bank looks like! Ha!

I stopped by the library and picked up Chamber of Secrets on my way home from work on Friday and finished it by 10pm on Saturday. Woohoo! I believe I liked it even better than the first one. Although it helped that I hadn't seen the movie, which left more of the character and possible plot development to the imagination! I tried to get Prisoner of Azkaban yesterday, and even though the library catalog said it was in, no one could find it. Boo.

So I choose a couple of 7-day books: Mitch Albom's The Five People You Meet in Heaven and Speak Softly, She Can Hear by Pam Lewis. I'm not overly impressed with the Albom book so far (just got through the first person), but it's so short I'm going to finish it anyway. People raved about Tuesday's with Morrie (I never read it), so hopefully this will be just as good.

Help Jayde

2005-08-06T08:04:00.000-05:00

Yesterday I posted a heartbreaking story about a child who died in a hot car. This morning I watched a beautiful story on the Today show about a Seattle photographer who helps families of terminally ill children. So when I got an email from a co-worker about an infant who suffered a stroke at birth and needs physical therapy, well I felt like I needed to share her story with you.

This is 14 month old Makaylie Jayde Garcia. Jayde has a mutated gene called Factor V Leiden. This caused her to suffer a stroke at birth and she has limited use of her left hand and arm (left hemiparesis). She needs to go to therapy for 21 days in Birmingham. The cost of the therapy is $15,000 plus travel and expenses. Because their insurance company will not cover these costs, they are asking friends and family to help out with the expenses. I don't know Jayde or her family personally, but you can click here to learn more about Jayde's condition, her parents, to see more pics, or to donate funds for her treatment.

Forgotten baby dies in car

2005-08-05T01:13:00.000-05:00

As reported in our daily paper today:

A mother's horror turned to a grave reality just before 6 p.m. Wednesday when she stopped to pick up her 1-year-old son from Madison's Place Day Care.

According to police, day care employees told the mother they had not seen Joseph Duemer - born July 15, 2004 - all day, and he had not been checked into the facility.

The mother returned to her vehicle to find Joseph dead in the back seat, said Lubbock police spokesman Lt. Roy Bassett. "He was in the back seat and had been back there all day," Bassett said.

It appears that the mom left the house at 8am, intending to take her son to daycare, but somehow forgot about the child and went straight to work. She went to pick the kid up at the daycare after work, but of course he'd never been dropped off. She went back to her car and found him - still strapped into his car seat - dead. He'd been in the windows-up car for 8 hours in 93 degree Lubbock heat.

The DAs office isn't sure if they are going to file charges yet. The police dept is saying it was unintentional, but does that make it forgivable?!!! I have no doubt she'll be on one of our probation caseloads in less than a year.

The death of any child is absolutely heartbreaking. Even more so in this situation when a loved one is to blame. I can't imagine the pain that either parent is undergoing tonight (or for the next 20 years). You always hear statistics that marriages rarely last after the death of a child. Can you imagine this couple's chances when the mother is actually responsible for her 1-year old's death??

Crackhead

2005-08-04T01:58:00.000-05:00

I did an intake with an offender recently who has a drug problem. He's a white male in his 30's. He began drinking about 10 years ago to cope with the pain of a devestating divorce. He said he never really took to liquor or beer, and decided to give powder cocaine a whirl. He took to it. He said at his peak was snorting up to 1/4 oz per night. Then at the suggestion of a friend, he switched over to crack (sadly he was trying to get this friend to stop shooting up, so they agreed to compromise by smoking the shit). He totally and completely took to it. He admitted that he would smoke on average $200 worth of crack a night, and at his peak would spend up to $1000/night. Incredible. I just don't get it.

Oh Blogger, I've saved and published revisions on this post five times now. You keep reverting to the original draft. I'm getting tired of re-typing these changes!! What is going on?!!

Time travel

2005-08-03T08:43:00.000-05:00

Last night I finally finished Audrey Nieffenegger's Time Traveler's Wife. One word: FANTASTIC! I started boo-hooing as soon as Henry went out to the front porch to start saying his good-byes. Oh man, I was crying so hard that I think TBF was wondering if someone in my own family had died! *

Anyway, I really enjoyed the sequencing of the story as Henry travels back and forth across the years, yet Clare manages to stay put - pleading with him not to leave yet patiently awaiting his return. Very well written and easy to follow. I also enjoyed the frequent change in voice to express both Henry and Clare's points of view. I'm not into sci fi at all, but this time travel book had a riveting plot and beautiful love story.

My only disappointment was that Clare was STILL waiting at the end. I mean, I get that he was the love of her life, but after Henry gave her his blessing to move on, I was hoping she'd continue her art career and have a bundle more kids (with anyone but dirty Gomez that is). I was sadened that at 82 she was still waiting... Nonetheless, I really enjoyed the story itself, and highly recommended it (for the two of you out there who haven't read it yet)!

*Speaking of death, first Nate, then Henry. And did you see the newest Real World (yeah, I usually don't watch, but it's an Austin-thing)? Danny's mother died. Jeez.

Alas! Ear wax!

2005-08-02T10:28:00.000-05:00

This weekend I finished my first Harry Potter book - yep, just finished The Sorcerer's Stone in 2005. Yikes. After all the hubbub from the most recent release of the 6th book, and trying to avoid reading anything that spoiled who died, I decided to go ahead and give the series a whirl - from the beginning.

No, I can't really explain how or why I managed to go eight years without ever getting started on J.K.Rowling's series. I think more than anything else I was shocked by how many bloggers were reading it. Okay, I'll admit it, I'm a little late but I'm now a follower of Harry, Ron, and Hagrid!

I'll get Chamber of Secrets this week. I've heard a couple of folks say the 4th book (Goblet of Fire) isn't so great, and I only have a limited amount of time before classes start this fall and I have to re-commit to textbook reading. Should I skip that one? Any other Harry Potter knowledge I need to be aware of before continuing my Hogwarts journey?

Obituary

2005-08-01T11:41:00.000-05:00

SIX FEET UNDER SPOILER AHEAD!!!

YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!

O.M.G. I can't believe he died.

Okay, so we know it is the last season of Six Feet Under. And especially since the last few weeks have been relatively bland, we guess that the show has got to end in a big mess of death and upheaval and confusion. So, I've been working on my own endings: Last night I was completely prepared for Ruth to get attacked by the cougar while she was camping. I've suspected all season that crazy Billy would come back and strangle Clare to death. I even considered that the oldest adopted boy would off Keith in a fit of rage. But this?! Oh, I never would've guessed. Poor Maggie... Well at least Nate died happy - I'm glad he told Brenda how he felt and that they weren't going to work out. I guess he really was "tired of fighting". Literally tired of fighting for his life...

How will the writers ever resolve this?! Pregnant Brenda. No mom OR dad for Maya. Clare is going to lose her mind, but at least she'll have the new stable boyfriend. And Ruth, oh poor Ruth - the one time she did anything crazy in her life and she didn't even get to see her son before he died. Oh, my stomach hurts just thinking about it.

FW: Mother of the bride dress

2005-07-25T00:17:00.000-05:00

As my own wedding day fast approaches, I really appreciated this humorous little email forward:

Jennifer's wedding day was fast approaching. Nothing could dampen her excitement - not even her parents' nasty divorce. Her mother had
found the PERFECT dress to wear and would be the best dressed
mother-of-the-bride ever!

A week later, Jennifer was horrified to learn that her father's new, young
girlfriend had bought the exact same dress! Jennifer asked her future mother in law to exchange it, but she refused. "Absolutely not. I look like a million bucks in this dress, and I'm wearing it," she replied.

Jennifer told her mother who graciously responded, "Never mind sweetheart. I'll get another dress. After all, it's your special day." A few days later, they went shopping and did find another gorgeous dress. When they stopped for lunch, Jennifer asked her mother, "Aren't you going to return the other dress? You really don't have another occasion where you could wear it."

Her mother just smiled and replied, "Of course I do, dear. I'm wearing it to the rehearsal dinner the night before the wedding!"

How smart is your right foot?

2005-07-24T00:04:00.000-05:00

THIS is weird. Try to outsmart your right foot.

1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles with it.

2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand. Your foot will change direction!!!

Here's to us!

2005-07-20T10:37:00.000-05:00

I heard this toast on Jenny McCarthy's new show tonight - Party at the Palms. Yes, I watched it. Yes, she's hot. And hilarious. And yes, the majority of the show was devoted to girl on girl lap dances. Jealous much? Anyway, here's the toast:

Here's to the men that we love.
Here's to the men that love us.
But the men that we love will never love us,
So fuck all the men
Here's to us!

Anyone like to share a favorite toast?

Drunk girl eats kraut car

2005-07-19T22:02:00.000-05:00

Pop quiz time!

Texas Biscuit holds which of the following Yahoo honors?
(A) #6 for "drunk girl stories"
(B) #4 for "man eats car"
(C) #1 for "how to can sour kraut"
(D) All of the above

Of course it's D. Wow, I'm really going places in the blogosphere. Right up the success ladder. Moving and shaking. Shaking my drunk sour kraut man loving booty all over the place. Woot.

Overdrafts and eBay

2005-07-18T10:09:00.000-05:00

There are few things worse for me than eagerly awaiting a paycheck, only to find that once it is deposited, my bank account is still practically negative. Between the direct deposit advances and the overdraft fees from those bounced checks, about 80% of last week's paycheck was just eaten up. It's barely past payday and I'm still broke. Ugh. What a miserable feeling.

How could this happen?! Well, after paying for my summer tuition, and a couple of slightly irresponsible money decisions in the past couple months, things were not looking good. As you may or may not have experienced, every once in a blue moon it becomes necessary to bounce a check. It's a calculated bounce, and sometimes that is better than say, going without cable or internet for 2 weeks! Wha-- MY priorities are messed up? Bah!

Anyhoo, I wrote the check and 2 days later as expected it cleared the bank - along with the stupid overdraft fee. And then came a rogue check for an embroidered work shirt I'd written about a month ago, and another one from an out of town dinner, and a gas fill up charge up I'd forgotten about. And unfortunately the list goes on. Eight overdraft fees, EIGHT! At $33 bucks a pop, plus the actual check amount. Yeah, you do the math. Painful.

So I this week I decided to do a little housekeeping. eBay is my friend. I've made lots of great purchases on eBay, but more importantly, about once a year I'll clean out drawers and closets and make a little cash. This particular eBay adventure included a ton of books and DVDs, some exercise equipment, and some jewelry I seldom wear. So far I'm up about $140 bucks, and still have 4 days left on the books. Hooray for eBay and immediate payment through PayPal!

Jezebel

2005-07-16T21:43:00.000-05:00

I guess this is what I get for leaving my underwear drawer open!
She's been sleeping there all day. Ah, a Saturday in the life of my Jezebel.

True friends

2005-07-12T09:53:00.000-05:00

I received this forward today, its an oldie but a goodie. I especially love #8.

Are you tired of all those sissy "friendship" poems that always sound good but never actually come close to reality? Well, here is a series of promises that really speaks to true friendship:

1. When you are sad - I will help get you drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.

2. When you are blue - I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.

3. When you smile - I will know you finally got laid.

4. When you are scared - I will rag on you about it every chance I get.

5. When you are worried - I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be and to quit whining.

6. When you are confused - I will use little words.

7. When you are sick - Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.

8. When you fall - I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.

Remember: A good friend will help you move. A really good friend will help you move a body. Let me know if I ever need to bring a shovel.

FW water gardens

2005-07-11T00:04:00.000-05:00

The Fort Worth water gardens hold a special place in my childhood memories. My parents used to take me there every summer when we'd head up north to visit my grandparents in Arlington. I fondly remember throwing pennies into the pools for good luck and climbing around on the non-fountain concrete blocks surrounding the park.

When TBF and I were in the area last weekend we accidentally stumbled upon the water garden district and peeked in to reminisce.

It was a disappointing experience. The main gardens (shown in the picture above) were fenced off with a 7-foot chain link fence. There were no water falls or fountains, in fact the only water in sight was the murky sludge that had accumulated in the bottom pool.

I've since discovered that this main pool is where a 12-year old girl from Chicago, two of her friends, and their father drowned just over a year ago. They were in town for a church convention. The girl slipped and grabbed her friend and they both tumbled into the water. The boy and his father jumped in to save the girls, but all four were immediately sucked underneath the surface. The depth of the pool was over 11 feet. They were all dead by the time paramedics were able to pull their bodies from the pool.

The families of the victims have received a cash settlement, and studies have been commissioned to determine the problems in the gardens and how to remedy them. The city hopes that the water gardens can be renovated and reopened as early as this fall.

The Fort Worth water gardens of my memory are a architecturally spectacular display - layers of concrete blocks, rushing waterfalls and calm pools. They are a wonderful location for families to wade, splash, picnic, and cool off from the Texas heat.

I tossed a penny in the fountain and wished that Fort Worth is able to upgrade the safety features of the gardens and reopen them soon.

Willie, Dylan, and Kelly

2005-07-07T22:41:00.000-05:00

Willie's 4th of July Picnic was fabulous as expected - in fact the whole weekend was a lot of fun. I took Friday off work and we headed up to Dallas. We stayed with TBF's best friend who greeted us with a ice chest full of beer, an enormous brisket that he'd been smoking for 24 hours, and buckets full of homemade potato salad - so you can guess how we spent the rest of the night. On Sunday we went to some friend's daughter's birthday party - she's 1 year old. They were one of those married couples who had successful careers and didn't want kids, but surprise! They have completely taken to parenting and are so happy - it was a happy day for all of us.

So Monday was the concert. We headed out to the Fort Worth stockyards around 4pm. My pics didn't turn out too well (unless you like to see the back of people's heads!). In the above you can see a teeny tiny portion of the people that were there. There were two stages and they alternated performances on each. It was hot as hell until the sun went down, but the evening was fantastic. Willie was great as always, but Bob Dylan stole the show. Hearing him perform Shooting Star in person ... absolutely incredible. I'll tell my kids about it one day. The show finished up around 1am with Willie, Los Lonely Boys, and a great fireworks show.

On Tuesday we all went out for mexican food, did some touristy stuff, and ended the afternoon with a tour of the Texas Rangers Ameriquest baseball field in Arlington. Here's a great pic from the press box. We also got to hang out in the Ranger's dug out, their batting practice area, work out gym, and owner's suite. It was a perfect day for a baseball game, but sadly had to get home for work.

Last night TBF took me to the Kelly Clarkson concert - her Behind These Hazel Eyes tour. Mock me if you must, but it was a damn fine concert. I just love this girl - she is so cute. She came off on stage exactly like you might've seen her on AI or on TV interviews - completely honest and fun loving.

The only disturbing part was the enormous number of tweens dressed in short flippy skirts and strappy tank tops. Don't get me wrong, they looked great - if they were 18. My parents would've beat the snot out of me if I tried walking out of the house showing that much leg when I was 13. Some of them wore more eye makeup than I do now!

However, everyone was having a great time and it was fun to be there. But more than anything I was happy to be 30 - out of high school, not worrying about cliques and having the newest cell phone or whatever the brand name jeans are these days. I was happy to sip a glass of wine in the lobby before the show and not worry if the bartender would ID me. And most of all I was happy to be in a committed relationship and not going through any of those idiot relationships that teenagers go through. Great concert, good reminder of the benefits of being older.

Happy 4th

2005-07-01T17:48:00.000-05:00

TBF and I are headed to Dallas to spend the weekend with friends.
On Monday we're going to Willie Nelson's 32nd Annual Fourth of July Picnic at the Fort Worth stock yards. 20,000 folks expected.
Willie + Bob Dylan + Los Lonely Boys and about 30 other performers.
Not looking forward to the 100 degree temps, but it gave me an excuse to get that straw cowboy hat I've been wanting for years. Should be fun!
I hope you all have a fabulous Independence Day.
I'll drink a $6 beer for ya!

Wedding dream

2005-06-28T14:29:00.000-05:00

Last night I dreamt that I was in dressing room preparing for my wedding when it suddenly occurred to me that I never arranged for a photographer or a videographer. A few moments later I heard them playing what I thought was my walk-down-the-aisle song, so I was rushing to get ready. I realized my hair was still wet but I didn't want to miss the song so I ran out into the church anyway (hell, I probably didn't have any makeup on either!). I saw tons of people flooding in, unfortunately 1/2 of them were old people that I didn't know, and the other 1/2 were coworkers whom I would never in a million years invite to my wedding. Kept scanning the crowd - not a single friend in site, no family (not even Dad walking me down the aisle), no attendants, and worst of all, no TBF. What a shitty wedding. And to top it all off, I looked down and was wearing a 70s-looking off the shoulder prom dress ... in RED.

Johnny vs. Bill

2005-06-25T00:18:00.000-05:00

I love
Johnny
Depp. I love the fact that he is a different guy in every movie. Always different. Always interesting. Always unique.

Sexy. Intelligent. Funny. Beautiful. Simple. Magnificent.
love. love. love. him.

Until... this. I read the book eons ago and I'm sure Charlie & the Chocolate Factory is going to be a good flick, but I just can't stand Johnny's face in the trailers I've seen the past few weeks. I mean, doesn't he remind you of the old Fire Marshall Bill character from In Living Color? You remember don't you? Those teeth? That smile? Ugh, that "smile" kills me. I can't watch this movie. It hurts me. Let me know how it is.

Friday Feast

2005-06-24T17:30:00.000-05:00

It's been a while since we've chowed down on a Friday Feast, so here ya go. Have a fantastic weekend!

Appetizer: What time do you usually wake up each day? If you could choose your wake-up time, when would it be?
During the week I usually wake up at 6:45. Earlier on the rare ocassion that I work out in the morning, later when I just can't drag my lazy butt out o bed. On the later days I have to weigh my options and choose one or more depending on how late I sleep: no shower, shower but don't wash hair, wash hair but don't dry and put in bun, no ironing, no makeup. Oh, the choices of womanhood.

Soup: When was the last time you bought groceries? What store did you go to? Name 3 things you purchased.
I used to buy groceries about once a week, especially when we were doing Atkins. Now, TBF goes a lot more shopping and cooking than me. The last time though I went to United and bought stuff for mini keylime cheese cakes for work: cream cheese, milk, limes.

Salad: How many books have you read so far this year? Which was your favorite and why?
Oh, due to school I'd say an average of about 1 per month. Not near enough personal reading, I know. I've said this 100 times before, ugh. Stupid school. Primarily on Darth's recommendation I bought Time Traveler's Wife this weekend, but oh, I haven't even cracked it. I picked up a bridal magazine too. Damn priorities.

Main Course: What is something you consider to be very elegant? In particular, what about that item/place/person conjures up the feeling of elegance?
Uh, disco saddles?! No really, the first thing that came to mind is chandeliers. We had one the house where I grew up in San Angelo. I'm sure it was very small and simple, but I remember it as a huge extravagant sparkling thing of beauty. Could it be because I was only 3 feet off the ground? Anyhoo, when we moved my mom took down the chandelier and saved all the dangly crystals. Now we decorate my grandmother's Christmas tree with them each year.

Dessert: Who taught you how to drive?
Love this question. My Uncle Jerry taught me to drive. He owned a driver's ed company in the Samoan Islands in the late 70s. So after they came back to the states he was the obvious choice to take me out for my lessons. I still remember my first few starts and stops and loops around an empty parking lot on a Sunday afternoon in College Station. Thanks Uncle Jerry!

I taste like bread?

2005-06-22T13:21:00.000-05:00

I'm so close to being caught up with all my work responsibilities it is almost too good to believe. I've been busting my booty this week to get current. Two things happened at work recently to motivate me to action: 1) I spent 4 hours of my should-be-out-by-the-pool Saturday up here, and 2) a girl got fired for being ricidulously delinquent in her duties (I'm talking documentation that was months and months past due). So, not only do I want to spend my entire weekend avoiding work duties but I'd also like to avoid the gossip mill as to the numerous reasons why I might've gotten canned. So, by 6pm there is a pretty good chance that I could have little check marks on my entire must-be-done list. Hooray! Okay, that was a nice breather, now back to work.

But first, a little something I've had drafted for quite a while. Thanks Serra! But, BREAD, c'mon am I really THAT boring?!! Aww, I am... *mopes back to stupid to-do list*

I taste like Bread.

I am a staple in almost everyone's diet. Friends like me are a complement to any other friends I get on with almost everyone, remaining mostly in the background, but providing substance when it would otherwise be lacking. What Flavour Are You?

Happy Father's Day

2005-06-19T20:36:00.000-05:00

Happy Father's Day to all you daddies out there! Hope it was a good one!

Sued II

2005-06-18T15:39:00.000-05:00

Thanks for all your concern over my law suit. No, it wasn't blogging-related - although that surely would've been more exciting!

The whole thing is pretty ridiculous (aren't most suits these days?!), and without saying too much, here are the basics:

In March I was in a car accident. I was ticketed for failure to yield right of way but the other driver nailed me on my back tire, so my insurance company refused to pay 100% since she was also at fault (she should've seen me already in the intersection). So she's suing.

I visited with my insurance agent last week, they are going to hire an atty, and even if this woman wins the suit, no money will come out of my pocket (what a blessing that I upgraded to full coverage when I got the Maxima; I used to only carry liability on my old car). So ACW was correct, all that this will take is my time. Unfortunately she filed the paperwork where she lives, about 120 miles from here, but even transportation costs will also be covered.

There are a couple screwy things about this case which will make it less likely for her to win, and as soon as it's all over I will be very pleased to tell you exactly what I think of this woman and her sue-happy tactics.

SUED!

2005-06-15T23:05:00.000-05:00

I received a certified letter today.
It begins:

NOTICE TO TEXAS BISCUIT,
YOU HAVE BEEN SUED.

I wish I were kidding. I'm not. More to come as details develop.
If I can discuss it with making things worse, that is. Arrgh.

Be delicious!

2005-06-13T19:21:00.000-05:00

A couple of weeks back I ran out of my old perfume and headed over to our only big department store (Dillards - yes, Lubbock is a sad sad town) for a new scent.

I ran around the counters spraying and sniffing and spritzing and sneezing ... and doing my best to avoid the pushy sales lady. But within minutes my nose was so messed up that I couldn't tell one from the next. The last time I went perfume shopping at a higher end store they had little bowls of coffee beans to clear your nose in between sniffs. Coffee beans! Who would've guessed?

Anyhoo, I found a great one. The moment I smelled it I knew it was perfect for me. Not too floral, not too heavy, and god knows not to old-ladyish! The winner? DKNY's Be Delicious. It's presented in a fabulous little metal and glass apple-shaped bottle. Unfortunately I have about as much skill in describing perfume undertones as I do wine notes. So although I would say it is fresh and fruity, you might get a better idea if I use DKNY's description: Amaerican Apple, Cucumber, Grapefruit, Magnolia. Mmmm, DELICIOUS INDEED!

Immortal Beloved

2005-06-12T09:36:00.000-05:00

I enjoyed a huge movie marathon this weekend while TBF has been out of town visiting his mom. I think I've already watched 9 DVDs (well, I've at least had them on in the background), and it's only Saturday (oops, is now Sunday morning - 3:27am - I'm too old to be up this late!).

Some funny (Friday), some silly (Legally Blonde), some for the excellent soundtracks (Grosse Pointe Blank and Chicago), some to make me smile (Father of the Bride), some to make me cry (Finding Neverland), some for the fine boys (Footloose and Legends of the Fall ... old Brad Pitt in a pony tail *swoons*).

But for a good love story, few are as passionate and heart wrenching as the story of Beethoven and his Immortal Beloved. This movie has always held a special place in my heart.

First, a powerful quote about the way we are moved by music:

Beethoven says, "Music is a dreadful thing. What is it? I don't understand it. What does it do?" Shindler says, "it exalts the soul." Beethoven says, "Utter nonsense. If you hear a marching band, is your soul exalted? No, you march. If you hear a waltz, you dance. If you hear a mass, you take communion. It is the power of the music to carry one directly into the mental state of the composer. The listener has no choice. It is like hypnotism."

And another quote - more mushy, but beautifully poignant - a letter written to his lover:

My angel, my all, my other self... While still in my bed, my thoughts turn to you, my immortal beloved. Some of them happy, some sad. Waiting to see whether fate will hear us. I can live only completely with you or not at all. Yes, it must be... I must go to sleep now. Be calm, love today, yesterday, what longing with tears for you, you, you're my life, my everything. Farewell then, go on loving me. Ever yours. Ever mine. Forever.

Saturday naps

2005-06-11T16:35:00.000-05:00

Cajun and I took a nap on the couch this afternoon. He wasn't quite ready to get up.

Quiz on the go

2005-06-10T17:49:00.000-05:00

Another weekend on my own. TBF is away. No errands. No responsibilities. What to do, what to do? Welp, let's begin with a little quiz on the go. I found this one on brokenshard over a month ago, but I really liked it.

01. Take the book that is closest to you, open it in page 18, what does line 4 says?
..."old girls - Nancy and Cathy. They were beautiful. My mother didn't want me to"...

02. Extend your left arm all you can. Wha is the first thing you can touch?
An almost empty Taco Bell cup. Navy couch pillow is just past the cup.

03. What was the last thing you watched on TV?
NBC Nightly News is on now. They are talking about bad weather across the country, and actually showed some footage of a tornado that hit the county north of my home last night. No injuries.

04. Without looking, try to guess what time it is.
5:30 pm

05. Now look at the clock, what time is it?
5:34 pm

06. Besides your computer, what can you hear?
TV, Cajun enjoying dinner, water running in apt upstairs.

07. When was the last time you walked on the street?
Oh, it's been a while - when I walk it is usally on the treadmill.

08. Before coming to this page, what site were you visiting?
Gmail, Wells Fargo to see if I should go out tonight or not.

09. What are you wearing?
Jeans and a white tank top, barefoot.

10. Did you dream last night?
Something about going to a party at some incredible house and running into people I haven't seen since high school. All the while I knew I was supposed to pick up TBF but couldn't get a hold of him...

11. When was the last time you laughed?
Just before I left work. The girl across the hall is undiagnosed OCD - she has to watch her computer turn off before she'll leave the office. Once she gets to the elevator she'll usually go back to check and make sure it's still off. I don't usually laugh about mental stuff, but this just struck me.

12. What is on the walls on the room where you are?
Print of George Seurat's A Sunday on La Grande Jatte above the fireplace to my right, large mirror to my left, and a painting of the Colorado mountains that my grandmother painted behind me.

13. Have you seen something weird lately?
Uh, there are two men that look like twins working on a busted ass jeep in my apartment parking lot. They are white & pasty - albino almost. I guess that is kinda weird.

14. What do you think of this test?
Fun & easy. Not too much thinking involved! ;)

15. What was the last movie you saw?
Watched Signs for the bizillionth time on Wed. I was all worked up about aliens after we got back from Roswell, so it seemed appropriate.

16. If you became a multi-millionaire tonight, what would you buy first?
New cars for myself, TBF, and my parents.

17. Tell me something I don't know about you. Be sincere:
Now that I'm back at probation, I'm afraid that my kindness will be seen as weakness.

18. If you could change something in the world, that wasn't politics related, what would it be?
I would save the tigers.

19. Do you like to dance?
I used to love to dance - I took ballet, pointe, tap & jazz from 5 yrs old until junior high then I was on dance team all four years in high school. I don't like to dance at the club so that limits my options now.

20. George Bush:
"There's an old saying in Tennessee - I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee - that says, fool me once, shame on - shame on you. Fool me - you can't get fooled again." -Nashville, TN, Sept 17, 2002

21.a. Imagine your first kid its a girl. What would you name her?
Lexa Leandra*

21.b. Imagine your first kid its a boy. What would you name him?
Blakely Ashton*

22. Have you ever thought of migrating to another country?
Nope. There are lots of destinations I'd like to travel to for a couple of weeks. But without actually experiencing the culture I couldn't say I'd move there permanently.

23. What language would you like to learn how to speak fluently?
Espanol. What ARE those probationers saying about me in the elevator?!

24. Name the top 3 TV shows you like the most right now:
Six Feet Under
House
24

25. Say something profound:
'Nothing is predestined: The obstacles of your past can become the gateways that lead to new beginnings.' -Ralph Blum

*Confession: These are not the names I would choose. These were the names of my first two cabbage patch kids. That whole name thing is too serious to come up with off the cuff, and I really haven't put a lot of thought into it.

How to guides

2005-06-09T01:39:00.000-05:00

Need a good Thursday laugh? Read True Craig's guides to: Making Things Entertaining (For Yourself ), and Avoiding Pushing Crack Dealers.

Roswell, NM

2005-06-08T22:57:00.000-05:00

TBF and I had an absolutely perfect weekend. Around noon on Friday we decided to take a little trip up the road to Roswell. I had a friend ask me, "What in the world do you do in Roswell?" (Are you familiar with Roswell, New Mexico? It's the site of the 1947 UFO crash, or "weather balloon landing" if you are a non-believer). Anyway, you might think there isn't a lot to do there. There is a mediocre museum and a ton of crappy big-eyed green-headed alien gift shops on the main drag. Oh, but there is so much more to Roswell.

Here's the synopsis of our weekend. Short drive (compared to Texas standards) - got there in 3 hours (plus gaining an hour on the way!). Very cheap and perfectly adequate $29 motel room. Friday night we went to Farley's (horrible service, don't waste your time!), then on to a quaint little country dance bar with a fantastic disco saddle*. Ate lots of super tasty world-class Mexican food. We hung out at the pool and caught some rays on Saturday afternoon. Went to a charming wine tasting room with live band on Saturday night, and came home with delicious New Mexico wine. Watched a movie after lunch on Sunday. Leisurely drive home, stopping to take pics (got some great cactus flower shots, above).

*I know I will forever be viewed as white-trash for saying this, but what I wouldn't do to own a disco saddle! I don't know what I'd do with it, maybe put it up in the garage and spin around to some old George Strait tunes when no one is home? Oh well, judge me if you must, that thing was sweet.

The Fishers are back!

2005-06-06T22:36:00.000-05:00

How much do I love Six Feet Under?!

I'm so excited that Season 5 started tonight. Incredible dream sequence where Lisa comes back to remind Brenda what a slut-bag she is and she even deserves to be miserable on her wedding day. Keith and David are going to have a baby. Poor Ruth, she was almost happy last season, and George had to go lose his marbles on her (okay, we all knew there was a reason he'd been married like 7 times). And I can't wait for Billy to lose it on Claire - you know he's going to.

We missed Season 1, but TBF's mom recorded the whole season and sent it to us. I've been addicted ever since. And it is the ONLY reason we subscribe to HBO (we spent 3 1/2 hours with Empire Falls this week, I love Ed Harris but this show was pretty disappointing). Anyway, HBO teases:

Everything.

Everyone.

Everywhere.

Ends.

Oooh, I'm not so fond of that whole "ends" thing. My favorite TV series of all time (second is Twin Peaks) is ending after only 5 years. Guess I better enjoy these last few months of funeral home bliss.

Back to work

2005-06-02T12:51:00.001-05:00

Well, things are going well back at the office. I've successfully completed almost two weeks and haven't gotten fired, reprimanded or sued*. Good times! Let me give you just two of the weird things about my office versus a normal office:

1) We generally don't put up pics of family or kids in our offices. Think about it. Do you really want a convicted felon to know what your kids look like? How would you feel about a dangerous criminal recognizing your sister at the bar? You get the idea. No pictures.

2) We are told (although I don't follow this recommendation) not to keep any pens, pencils or other sharp objects on our desks. Same goes for heavy objects (like hole punchers). Could be used as weapons if an offender is high or just goes nuts on their officer. Yikes.

* Unlike a friend of mine who got a call this week from a woman who accused her ex (the guy on probation) of cooking & selling meth out of a motel room. Naturally the officer called narcotics to investigate. Well, a couple hours later the woman was calling the officer bitching because the cops were involved. She claims she's going to sue the officer and the department. Good luck with that lady.

Fave stories

2005-05-31T00:55:00.000-05:00

Since I started working at probation 5 years ago, my friends always ask for two things: to see my badge and for funny stories. My badge has been lost for ages (if you ever see someone impersonating TB, please confiscate that badge!), so here are two of my all-time favorite drunk probationer offenses:

A girl was drinking with friends at a local bar. Her friends thought she was too drunk to drive home, so they called her a cab. The cabbie arrived and went inside to find the girl. Unfortunately the girl walked outside about the same time, got in the cab, and drove herself home! Her friends gave the cops the girl's address so they were able to find her and the stolen cab. She managed to get home in one piece, but unfortunately picked up an Unauthorized Use of Vehicle charge.

One of my other favorite stories is a girl who was drunk when she left Tom's daiquiri bar (and anyone who's ever been to Tom's knows there is no other way to leave there!). Within two blocks of the bar she rear-ended another vehicle at a stop light. This other vehicle just happened to be a police.officer.in.a.marked.cruiser. Oopsy!

More amusing, unfortunate, disturbing (and always anonymous) stories to come!