I’ve been under a lot of stress for the past couple months – regular holiday stuff, my 30th birthday, return to grad school, work, wedding planning … and some abnormal test results.
I went in for my yearly womanly exam on December 2nd, then a couple weeks later received that self-addressed letter in the mail. I’ve been doing this for a dozen years already, and always got that same form letter: blah blah blah normal blah blah.
This year, I was stunned to see a different word jump out at me - my pap came back ABNORMAL. The doctor added a hand-written note to call her office as soon as possible to schedule a colposcopy.
Well, as bad news usually does, the letter came on Friday – too late to call the doctor and find out what in the world this meant. Thank God for the internet – we spent hours studying up on all the possibilities. And there were dozens of them.
It could be nothing – just a bad sample – but could also be an infection, STD, or the big one – cancer.
I had to wait for four weeks to get an appt for the procedure. There were some days I didn’t even think about it – forced myself to realize there was nothing I could do about it, and no sense in making myself crazy with worry.
Other days were not so good. There were a couple mornings I cried in the shower or on my way to work. What if I did have cancer at 30? My life – particularly the past couple months had been magnificent – I’d gotten engaged to my long-time boyfriend, got a new car, started going to church, and was doing great in school – what a shock for something like this to happen... And my biggest concern: what if this thing prevented me from having kids?
A month later, under a high powered microscope and with some vinegar solution, the doc found 2 abnormal “spots” on my cervix - she took biopsies of these 2 spots, as well as an ECC. It was very uncomfortable and crampy, but the physical discomfort was nothing compared to the emotional agony I had been in for the previous month.
Seven more days of waiting for the test results. I had my conference with the dr on Friday ... I’m fine. The dr said that all three biopsies showed dysplasia - basically cancerous cells had developed on my cervix - but they are already in the process of healing themselves. Yeah, did you know that you could develop cancerous cells and that your body could start fighting them without even having a symptom? I was fascinated also.
I have been blessed with this outcome - for a wake-up call of sorts. I have to go back for a follow-up in 6 months, but the main thing I can do is to start taking better care of myself – keep not-smoking, drink less, avoid stress (ha!), eat better, start exercising, and keep the sex within our "closed unit". My heart goes out to all of you who have experienced similar or more unfortunate circumstances. I'm not out of the woods just yet, but I am grateful for this opportunity to re-prioritize my life.
Monday, January 31, 2005
Sunday, January 30, 2005
Kraut JUICE?!
I was at the store this afternoon searching for some sugar-free juice to help minimize my hangover (hard to find by the way - had to go for mix-it-yourself Crystal Light). Anyway, right next to the V8 was something I'd never seen before.
Kraut juice. Cabbage juice and salt. Hmm.
Did a little Google search to find out it is used in lots of recipes, drinks, and as a vitamin C supplement. It's listed here as one of the 8 worst convenience foods.
As disgusting as it sounds, I probably woulda liked the stuff. I love sour kraut, and have been known to drink the pickle juice straight from the jar. Oh, and I love that limon flavored salt they sell at the convenience store. I think my diet must be lacking in something...
Friday, January 28, 2005
Friday Feast
Tons of work to do today - end of the month paperwork that I've been procrastinating on... Dr's appt at 11... Tutoring/mentoring at a nearby elementary school at 3... Friend's birthday party/happy hour at 5... So let the weekend begin. Thank God, I didn't think it would ever get here.
So in the interest of time, here's the quick and dirty version of Friday Feast. Get to know a little bit more about me over a five-course meal.
Appetizer - If you could have a free subscription to any magazine, which one would you like to have?
I really like Lucky - a fun shopping & fashion mag - but I got that subscription for Christmas, so I'd have to shoot for anything bridal related. The Knot is my current favorite. Free would be good - those things are pricey.
Soup - If you were to suddenly become famous, what would you choose as your stage name?
Not sure why, but Busty McPherson comes to mind. Don't ask me why - not enough sleep last night... I don't see any possibility of becoming a famous porn star any time soon, but becoming a famous singer or WNBA star is equally unlikely. Pfft. Maybe I could become the famous lottery-winning millionaire and I'd change my name to I-Haven't-Talked-To-You-Since-High-School-Stop-Calling-Me!
((Holy crap! I just googled Busty McP to see if it was a real person, and clicked on a link and got a ton of porn pop ups. I couldn't get them closed fast enough!! I'm expecting a call from our network admin any minute now. Aaak!))
Salad - What ingredients make an awesome salad? Dressing? Croutons?
Romaine lettuce, cucumber, hard boiled eggs, green olives, a bit of feta, real-bacon crumbles, homemade croutons from day old bread, ranch dressing. Weird combo I know, but these are all my faves. Usually don't have them all in one salad, but I'd give it a whirl.
Main Course - What do you like most about your current job?
Being in court everyday and witnessing our legal system in action (not that it always has a good outcome, but it IS always an interesting experience).
Dessert - Who is your favorite instrumental musician (not a singer)?
Tough. I'm sure I'll think of someone really brilliant tonight, but am kinda drawing a blank now. I have a few Danny Wright CDs that I listen to while I'm studying - all piano. Some good original compositions, plus remakes of old classics and show tunes.
So in the interest of time, here's the quick and dirty version of Friday Feast. Get to know a little bit more about me over a five-course meal.
Appetizer - If you could have a free subscription to any magazine, which one would you like to have?
I really like Lucky - a fun shopping & fashion mag - but I got that subscription for Christmas, so I'd have to shoot for anything bridal related. The Knot is my current favorite. Free would be good - those things are pricey.
Soup - If you were to suddenly become famous, what would you choose as your stage name?
Not sure why, but Busty McPherson comes to mind. Don't ask me why - not enough sleep last night... I don't see any possibility of becoming a famous porn star any time soon, but becoming a famous singer or WNBA star is equally unlikely. Pfft. Maybe I could become the famous lottery-winning millionaire and I'd change my name to I-Haven't-Talked-To-You-Since-High-School-Stop-Calling-Me!
((Holy crap! I just googled Busty McP to see if it was a real person, and clicked on a link and got a ton of porn pop ups. I couldn't get them closed fast enough!! I'm expecting a call from our network admin any minute now. Aaak!))
Salad - What ingredients make an awesome salad? Dressing? Croutons?
Romaine lettuce, cucumber, hard boiled eggs, green olives, a bit of feta, real-bacon crumbles, homemade croutons from day old bread, ranch dressing. Weird combo I know, but these are all my faves. Usually don't have them all in one salad, but I'd give it a whirl.
Main Course - What do you like most about your current job?
Being in court everyday and witnessing our legal system in action (not that it always has a good outcome, but it IS always an interesting experience).
Dessert - Who is your favorite instrumental musician (not a singer)?
Tough. I'm sure I'll think of someone really brilliant tonight, but am kinda drawing a blank now. I have a few Danny Wright CDs that I listen to while I'm studying - all piano. Some good original compositions, plus remakes of old classics and show tunes.
Thursday, January 27, 2005
AI: New Orleans & Vegas auditions
Tuesday night's show in New Orleans:
Sundeep was the tall guy in the suit who sang Eye of the Tiger - he even warmed up by doing the Sylvester Stallone air-punching-bag. He's an accountant, and yes I think I mentioned he was wearing a suit, so you can guess how badly that turned out.
My favorite moment was when Simon told Paula listening to her commentary was like watching Antiques Road Show: people kind of tune out during the description - all we really want to know is how much that damn vase is worth, ie are we going to Hollywood or not?!
Wednesday night in Vegas:
There was a set of twins at the end of the New Orleans show that didn't make it through but the judges said one was definitely better than the other. Well the better of the two Molfetta twins showed up in Vegas and made it through. I'm glad he came back.
Did you see the guy with the crazy eyes? I can't find his pic now, but he looked like a complete nut - huge buggy eyes when he talked. He recounted some wacky story about being deaf at birth and that Neil Diamond was the first song he ever heard and he's been a fan ever since. But then he butchered one of my faves, Coming to America. How could he disrespect Neil that way?!
There was a "cocktail waitress" named Sharon Galvez who had some of the longest legs I've ever seen. Simon couldn't get enough, and the editors were careful to show him giving the girl the "up-down". We also saw a showgirl who Simon let through in all likelihood to get a look at her showgirl friends in the next round. Actually both of these girls had great voices so they should be fun to watch in the upcoming shows.
Vegas even brought us a 22-year old psychic. Evidently she shook her magic 8 ball and when she saw a "10" she assumed she would be in the top 10. Not so much. She was horrid - no better singer than she is a psychic.
In my opinion Jennifer Todd had the best voice of the night. She sang Alicia Keys' If I Ain't Got You. As a plus size woman I doubt she'll make it to the top five, as there still seems to be more stigma out there for the larger ladies than guys (ie Ruben). However, I am thrilled that they put her through, and especially glad that Simon held his tongue and didn't get ugly about her weight.
Wednesday, January 26, 2005
Crotch rockets
*UPDATE: I have removed the pic from this post because for the past 8 months, I keep getting nothing but "CR" hits from Google Images. Time for a little variety! Goodbye pic! -TB 9/12/05*
*UPDATE #2: ARGH! I'm still getting tons of hits on this post - even without the pic. Okay, so now I'm going in to change all reference of cr*tch r*ckets to "CRs". -TB 9/19/05*
On my way to work there was a young kid (I'm just assuming he was a kid - surely an adult wouldn't be so stupid!) darting in and out of traffic on one of those damn sportbikes, or "CRs" as the cool kids call them these days.
Those things scare the piss out of me. I am constantly amazed at how they just appear out of nowhere in my rear view mirror, swoosh my long golden locks back (thanks La Chat!), then are gone in an instant. That is on the interstate so I can begin to deal with that. But what really gets me is the speeding and quick maneuvers on our safe little city streets.
My morning drive takes me down a busy street, 3 lanes each way and a turn lane. Always pretty packed at 7:45am (oh, who am I kidding - I rarely even leave the house until 7:55!), several signal lights, but still averaging speeds of 45-55 in between. But this morning this maniac shot by me at what must have been close to 90. Cars were throwing on their brakes to avoid him. I'm pretty sure he wouldn't have gotten hit anyway, but I think we're all a little concerned about being responsible for taking the guy out.
All these crashes appear to be on tracks, but I can only imagine the kind of injuries the driver is looking at (if he lives!) if he knicked another car and got launched into a pole or just flat got hit and mangled by all the passing cars that couldn't stop (don't you remember the lesson in driver's ed which states it is better to just go ahead and hit the dog/raccoon/deer/maniac, than to slam on your brakes, lose control, and cause an even bigger wreck?!)
Last week, a guy was charged with two counts of reckless driving in my court and given probation. He told the judge that the night of the first incident he was driving 137 in a 45 MPH zone. The second arrest was only 5 days later, 142 in a 55 MPH. Un-freaking-believable.
The guy no longer has his CR, or so he told the judge, so hopefully he wasn't the one racing down my street this morning. But I just don't get it. What kind of rush does that kind of speed and danger give a person, and why doesn't the fear of death or paralysis squelch that rush?
*UPDATE #2: ARGH! I'm still getting tons of hits on this post - even without the pic. Okay, so now I'm going in to change all reference of cr*tch r*ckets to "CRs". -TB 9/19/05*
On my way to work there was a young kid (I'm just assuming he was a kid - surely an adult wouldn't be so stupid!) darting in and out of traffic on one of those damn sportbikes, or "CRs" as the cool kids call them these days.
Those things scare the piss out of me. I am constantly amazed at how they just appear out of nowhere in my rear view mirror, swoosh my long golden locks back (thanks La Chat!), then are gone in an instant. That is on the interstate so I can begin to deal with that. But what really gets me is the speeding and quick maneuvers on our safe little city streets.
My morning drive takes me down a busy street, 3 lanes each way and a turn lane. Always pretty packed at 7:45am (oh, who am I kidding - I rarely even leave the house until 7:55!), several signal lights, but still averaging speeds of 45-55 in between. But this morning this maniac shot by me at what must have been close to 90. Cars were throwing on their brakes to avoid him. I'm pretty sure he wouldn't have gotten hit anyway, but I think we're all a little concerned about being responsible for taking the guy out.
All these crashes appear to be on tracks, but I can only imagine the kind of injuries the driver is looking at (if he lives!) if he knicked another car and got launched into a pole or just flat got hit and mangled by all the passing cars that couldn't stop (don't you remember the lesson in driver's ed which states it is better to just go ahead and hit the dog/raccoon/deer/maniac, than to slam on your brakes, lose control, and cause an even bigger wreck?!)
Last week, a guy was charged with two counts of reckless driving in my court and given probation. He told the judge that the night of the first incident he was driving 137 in a 45 MPH zone. The second arrest was only 5 days later, 142 in a 55 MPH. Un-freaking-believable.
The guy no longer has his CR, or so he told the judge, so hopefully he wasn't the one racing down my street this morning. But I just don't get it. What kind of rush does that kind of speed and danger give a person, and why doesn't the fear of death or paralysis squelch that rush?
Fwd: never piss off a Texas woman
A west Texas cowboy's wife came home just in time to find her husband in bed with another woman. With super-human strength, borne of fury and cutting calves, she dragged him down the stairs, out the back door, and into the tool shed out back of the barn. She put his tally-whacker in a vice, and then secured it tightly and removed the handle. Next she picked up an old carpenter's saw. The banged up Cowboy was terrified, and hollered, "Stop! Stop! You're not going to cut it off with that rusty damn saw, are you?" The wife, with a gleam of revenge in her eye, put the saw in her husband's hand and said, "Nope. I'm going to set this old shed on fire, and go to town for a cold beer. You do whatever you want!!!"
Tuesday, January 25, 2005
Gifts galore!
ACW inspired this post with a question that Darth asked him. Thanks guys, I'm feeling awfully lazy and un-original this week...
This is for those of you guys and gals who (1) are married, (2) were once married, or (3) ever day dream of someday getting married ...
let's talk about gifts.
Ever wondered about the tradition behind a bridal registry? Well me neither until today, but here you go anyway:
Originating in France, the bridal registry dates back to the 19th century, when great distances between the bride and groom was common and communication was difficult. What was one to do? Christofle, a fine manufacturer of silverware, was the man that found the solution to the problem: the bride's parents would select in advance their daughter's "trousseau." Thus the Bridal Registry was thus born!
So now that that historical mumbo jumbo is out of the way, here are the questions of the day.
(1) Where did you/would you register for your wedding? Practicality counts here - what do you and your fiance really need and don't want to or can't afford to buy for yourselves? And what one store could you find most of those things?
(2) Where would you register for your wedding IF MONEY WERE NO OPTION? Suppose all your guests - hundreds of them - were gazillionaires, and they are dying to spend their hard earned/trust fund money on you and your fiance. Give us the name of a store or even better a link so we can check out some of the grand gifts you'd be getting...
Monday, January 24, 2005
Sidewalk art
I received these pics in an email forward this weekend. Supposedly they are done only with chalk on the sidewalks of New York City. The depth they achieve is amazing, isn't it?!
Saturday, January 22, 2005
Mehrrr
How about a little Saturday morning catblogging as
I'm too sleepy to think of anything clever to write?
This is our Cajun lounging on my favorite blanket. You can
always find him on the blanket - unless I'm in bed too, in which case
he'll be laying his fat butt on my head. I love him,
but I really wish he wouldn't hog my pillow.
I'm too sleepy to think of anything clever to write?
This is our Cajun lounging on my favorite blanket. You can
always find him on the blanket - unless I'm in bed too, in which case
he'll be laying his fat butt on my head. I love him,
but I really wish he wouldn't hog my pillow.
Friday, January 21, 2005
Friday Feast
Big toss up between Friday Feast and Friday Catblogging for today. I may just have to do both. But first... a buffet for your brain.
Appetizer - What is one quality you really admire about yourself?
This is the appetizer? This is tough... I think I'll say I admire that I am a nice person. Not just polite-nice, but really-care-about-how-people-feel-nice. I will look you in the eyes and really LISTEN when you are talking. And when I ask how you are doing, I really want to know, and will gladly hang out for half an hour if you need to get off your chest why things are sucking this week.
Soup - What kind of shampoo and conditioner do you use?
The last time I got my hair highlighted I bought the expensive hair salon stuff (TIGI Dumb Blonde), but really, it isn't any better than the stuff I can get at Walgreens. Every now and then I'll splurge, but usually it's just Pantene.
Salad - Describe your favorite movie scene. You know, the one that just gets to you every time you watch it.
As you might guess, I've been in an especially wedding-ish mood since we got engaged, so for today's favorite movie I pick Steve Martin's version of Father of the Bride. My favorite scene is when Annie and George are playing b-ball in the driveway the night before her wedding and it starts to snow. Annie is disappointed and says,"What's that look for Dad… this is going to end up costing you more money, isn't it?" Her dad replies, "No, I was just thinking how I'm going to remember this moment for the rest of my life." I'm such a sap - I'm tearing up now just thinking about it!
Main Course - If you were a veggie, which one would you be, and why?
Uh, could get dirty here. Favorite to eat or favorite to, uh, well - let's just stick with favorite veggie to eat. I love mushrooms. I love them fresh on a salad, on a sausage pizza, stuffed with crab and cheese, marinated in wine and dumped on a steak, in a creamy soup. Don't I sound like Bubba Gump? Broiled Mushrooms, Fried Mushrooms, Grilled Mushrooms...
Geez Louise. I just reread the question. Has nothing to do with my favorite veggie to eat. I'm too easily distracted by food. Oh well, I ain't going back now. Please disregard above question.
Dessert - If you could take a weekend trip within 100 miles of your current residence, where would you like to go?
Well, there are a very limited number of choices within 100 miles of Lubbock, unless you like camping in the middle of a mesquite tree patch. Lake Alan Henry is nice, but not so much fun without a boat. Palo Duro Canyon State Park has a fabulous outdoor play about the history of the state, but it's only during the summer. I've always wanted to try to eat the 72 oz steak at The Big Texan in Amarillo, but there is an hour limit to eat the steak and all the sides, and I have all weekend for my trip ... SO, I think I'd have to shoot for a place I've always wanted to check out, the historic Garza Hotel in Post. Can't beat two days shacked up in an creaky 1800's ghosty hotel with your new fiance!
Appetizer - What is one quality you really admire about yourself?
This is the appetizer? This is tough... I think I'll say I admire that I am a nice person. Not just polite-nice, but really-care-about-how-people-feel-nice. I will look you in the eyes and really LISTEN when you are talking. And when I ask how you are doing, I really want to know, and will gladly hang out for half an hour if you need to get off your chest why things are sucking this week.
Soup - What kind of shampoo and conditioner do you use?
The last time I got my hair highlighted I bought the expensive hair salon stuff (TIGI Dumb Blonde), but really, it isn't any better than the stuff I can get at Walgreens. Every now and then I'll splurge, but usually it's just Pantene.
Salad - Describe your favorite movie scene. You know, the one that just gets to you every time you watch it.
As you might guess, I've been in an especially wedding-ish mood since we got engaged, so for today's favorite movie I pick Steve Martin's version of Father of the Bride. My favorite scene is when Annie and George are playing b-ball in the driveway the night before her wedding and it starts to snow. Annie is disappointed and says,"What's that look for Dad… this is going to end up costing you more money, isn't it?" Her dad replies, "No, I was just thinking how I'm going to remember this moment for the rest of my life." I'm such a sap - I'm tearing up now just thinking about it!
Main Course - If you were a veggie, which one would you be, and why?
Uh, could get dirty here. Favorite to eat or favorite to, uh, well - let's just stick with favorite veggie to eat. I love mushrooms. I love them fresh on a salad, on a sausage pizza, stuffed with crab and cheese, marinated in wine and dumped on a steak, in a creamy soup. Don't I sound like Bubba Gump? Broiled Mushrooms, Fried Mushrooms, Grilled Mushrooms...
Geez Louise. I just reread the question. Has nothing to do with my favorite veggie to eat. I'm too easily distracted by food. Oh well, I ain't going back now. Please disregard above question.
Dessert - If you could take a weekend trip within 100 miles of your current residence, where would you like to go?
Well, there are a very limited number of choices within 100 miles of Lubbock, unless you like camping in the middle of a mesquite tree patch. Lake Alan Henry is nice, but not so much fun without a boat. Palo Duro Canyon State Park has a fabulous outdoor play about the history of the state, but it's only during the summer. I've always wanted to try to eat the 72 oz steak at The Big Texan in Amarillo, but there is an hour limit to eat the steak and all the sides, and I have all weekend for my trip ... SO, I think I'd have to shoot for a place I've always wanted to check out, the historic Garza Hotel in Post. Can't beat two days shacked up in an creaky 1800's ghosty hotel with your new fiance!
Thursday, January 20, 2005
Is it Spring already?
Not to make you jealous or anything, but it was a sunny 71 degrees today in my warm West Texas town. 71 in mid-January?! Yeah, but it'll probably snow tomorrow - that's Texas for ya. The old saying is, "if you don't like the weather, just wait a second and it'll change". Still, it's really something compared to that -54 nonesess in Embarrass Minnesota this week. Anyone feel like traveling south for the winter?
First of many AI posts
I tried, friends, really I tried. I told myself that I wouldn't post about American Idol until they got to the top 10 show. But I just can't wait. I realize I'm facing ridicule, but that is okay. I love this show soooo much. Time to 'fess up:
Yes, I own an American Idol DVD.
Yes, I went to the first season's top-ten concert in Dallas.
Yes, I bought the t-shirt.
Yes, I've downloaded a dozen of Kelly Clarkson's songs.
Yes, American Idol was THE reason I bought a TiVo last year.
Are you still there???
Will you come back knowing you'll probably have to suffer through at least one of these AI posts a week? Will you remove me from your blogroll out of shame?! Well, I guess I'm just going to have to take my chances. I trust you to stick around.
Okay, really, after all that nonsense I don't even have much to say about the tryout shows in DC and St. Louis. Complete screw balls. Like the guy who sang the theme song from Baywatch?! Or Toni Braxton's cousin? Where do these kids get their self-confidence?! If I ever suck at anything that bad and risk proving it to the world on national TV, please, somebody, JUST TELL ME I SUCK!!
So if I had to pick my favorite contender from the first two shows, I'd have to go for this Travis guy. Can't remember his last name, but he's the one who did some pretty sweet break dancing with the heart-pump thing before he sang. He's definitely top 10 material. Don't forget I said so!
Wednesday, January 19, 2005
TB's auto history
Boring personal-history post ahead, but I'm just so excited, I just have to share ALL the background with you. Oh, and thanks to eBay for making this post a bit more colorful!
I grew up in South Texas, middle-class family, only child, excellent school district. I wasn't a spoiled brat by any means, but I'm now aware that my parents definitely did without so I could wear my Guess and Z-Cavaricci jeans (tight-rolled of course!), Coca-Cola shirts, Liz Claibourne purses, Swatch watches, and Kaeppas to school. Of course my mom was kinda a fashion nut (not that you'd know it by the horrid clothes she allowed me to wear in the 80s!), but I think she enjoyed living vicariously through me.
However, the line of generousity was drawn at clothes and extracurricular activities. I was never one of those privileged kids who got a new car when they turned 16, or any car for that matter. I sported my mom's '84 gold Camry to school, football games, and parties. Not so stylish, but hey, it had 4 wheels and got me from here to there. Needless to say there were no sexy parties in the back seat of that car!
In 1993 I graduated and was moving 550 miles away for school. My dad's argument was that I was living in the dorms, could walk to class and the library, and what more did I need? HA! Luckily mom pulled through for me. Her mother (in her 80s at the time) lived about 20 miles away from my school, was convinced we needed each other, and that I needed a car to get out there. I can still remember the scortching hot summer day on the car lot when I fell in love with my dream car. It was an '90 Accord, 2 door, slate blue, just beautiful. I loved it and babied it.
And then ... an idiot ex-boyfriend decided it would be a good idea to race it a bit on a busy road. He lost control, drove into head-on traffic, hit a van with kids in it, spun around a few times, and ended up in a Black Eyed Pea parking lot. I'm getting angry just thinking about it. But you know what the worse part was? He never apologized to me or to my parents for wrecking my beautiful blue car. Yeah, I'm still bitter.
Well needless to say he wasn't supposed to be driving and I (and my parents!) got dropped by the insurance company. The car was totaled, but I did get a small check from State Farm, between that and school loans I was able to invest in another Accord. It was older and not as nice, and didn't have an A/C, but it still got me from here to there... for a while. That same ex lived in South Texas, and even after the wreck I drove over 1000 miles almost every other weekend to see him for a couple years. Hmm, who's the idiot now?! Okay, so I ragged out the black Honda pretty quick plus it had some catastrophic mechanic problem in 2001. I couldn't afford the repair, so just kept dodging the mechanic and eventually he took possession of it. Bye-bye black Honda.
Within a year my dad's mom had to move into a retirement home and could no longer drive. I got her very-well-cared-for, but very-grandmother-like '89 Mercury Grand Marquis. As a girl that was accustomed to driving little Accords, this thing was a dinosaur! It took a while to get used to, and I was blessed to have it, but I was pretty damn embarrassed to be driving this huge old relic to school and work. Maybe it shouldn't matter, but I just can't feel proud chatting and walking to the parking garage and having new friends see what I'm driving. I wouldn't even offer to pick friends up for dinner or drinks. It just wasn't a cool car, and in spite of my usual self-confidence, I just couldn't feel cool driving it.
So in December I was in a 7-car pileup. I don't think I had many readers back then, so here is the story and the picture. I was completely not at fault, and the driver's insurance covered all the damage to my car, plus some. I probably couldn't get more than $250-500 as a trade-in, but the other driver's company cut me a very generous check when I turned over the car to them last week. Excellent. Well, the big ol' boat turned out to be good for something, didn't it!
Okay, enough blah blah blah, here's the good news. With the insurance check and some money I'd been saving I purchased my new car last weekend. It isn't all that new, but is absolutely gorgeous. It's a black Maxima, leather interior, tinted windows, power everything, Bose CD system. I am absolutely thrilled to have a vehicle that can not only safely get us from Texas to [insert your city here], but also that I can be proud to drive. I mean, when a girl is 30 years old, the least she can ask for is for her home and vehicle to reflect that she's done something with her life, and can manage her finances, and has at least a tiny bit of style. Now I'm finally that girl.
This weekend I had the opportunity to thank my parents for NOT buying me a brand new car when I was 16. I've been blessed to always have transportation, even if it wasn't the most stylish on the block. But I keep thinking, what if I would've been given that BMW or Corvette when I was younger, without working for it, and without experiencing the alternative, what would I have ever had to look forward to?! And would I appreciate what I have now? I don't think so.
I grew up in South Texas, middle-class family, only child, excellent school district. I wasn't a spoiled brat by any means, but I'm now aware that my parents definitely did without so I could wear my Guess and Z-Cavaricci jeans (tight-rolled of course!), Coca-Cola shirts, Liz Claibourne purses, Swatch watches, and Kaeppas to school. Of course my mom was kinda a fashion nut (not that you'd know it by the horrid clothes she allowed me to wear in the 80s!), but I think she enjoyed living vicariously through me.
However, the line of generousity was drawn at clothes and extracurricular activities. I was never one of those privileged kids who got a new car when they turned 16, or any car for that matter. I sported my mom's '84 gold Camry to school, football games, and parties. Not so stylish, but hey, it had 4 wheels and got me from here to there. Needless to say there were no sexy parties in the back seat of that car!
In 1993 I graduated and was moving 550 miles away for school. My dad's argument was that I was living in the dorms, could walk to class and the library, and what more did I need? HA! Luckily mom pulled through for me. Her mother (in her 80s at the time) lived about 20 miles away from my school, was convinced we needed each other, and that I needed a car to get out there. I can still remember the scortching hot summer day on the car lot when I fell in love with my dream car. It was an '90 Accord, 2 door, slate blue, just beautiful. I loved it and babied it.
And then ... an idiot ex-boyfriend decided it would be a good idea to race it a bit on a busy road. He lost control, drove into head-on traffic, hit a van with kids in it, spun around a few times, and ended up in a Black Eyed Pea parking lot. I'm getting angry just thinking about it. But you know what the worse part was? He never apologized to me or to my parents for wrecking my beautiful blue car. Yeah, I'm still bitter.
Well needless to say he wasn't supposed to be driving and I (and my parents!) got dropped by the insurance company. The car was totaled, but I did get a small check from State Farm, between that and school loans I was able to invest in another Accord. It was older and not as nice, and didn't have an A/C, but it still got me from here to there... for a while. That same ex lived in South Texas, and even after the wreck I drove over 1000 miles almost every other weekend to see him for a couple years. Hmm, who's the idiot now?! Okay, so I ragged out the black Honda pretty quick plus it had some catastrophic mechanic problem in 2001. I couldn't afford the repair, so just kept dodging the mechanic and eventually he took possession of it. Bye-bye black Honda.
Within a year my dad's mom had to move into a retirement home and could no longer drive. I got her very-well-cared-for, but very-grandmother-like '89 Mercury Grand Marquis. As a girl that was accustomed to driving little Accords, this thing was a dinosaur! It took a while to get used to, and I was blessed to have it, but I was pretty damn embarrassed to be driving this huge old relic to school and work. Maybe it shouldn't matter, but I just can't feel proud chatting and walking to the parking garage and having new friends see what I'm driving. I wouldn't even offer to pick friends up for dinner or drinks. It just wasn't a cool car, and in spite of my usual self-confidence, I just couldn't feel cool driving it.
So in December I was in a 7-car pileup. I don't think I had many readers back then, so here is the story and the picture. I was completely not at fault, and the driver's insurance covered all the damage to my car, plus some. I probably couldn't get more than $250-500 as a trade-in, but the other driver's company cut me a very generous check when I turned over the car to them last week. Excellent. Well, the big ol' boat turned out to be good for something, didn't it!
Okay, enough blah blah blah, here's the good news. With the insurance check and some money I'd been saving I purchased my new car last weekend. It isn't all that new, but is absolutely gorgeous. It's a black Maxima, leather interior, tinted windows, power everything, Bose CD system. I am absolutely thrilled to have a vehicle that can not only safely get us from Texas to [insert your city here], but also that I can be proud to drive. I mean, when a girl is 30 years old, the least she can ask for is for her home and vehicle to reflect that she's done something with her life, and can manage her finances, and has at least a tiny bit of style. Now I'm finally that girl.
This weekend I had the opportunity to thank my parents for NOT buying me a brand new car when I was 16. I've been blessed to always have transportation, even if it wasn't the most stylish on the block. But I keep thinking, what if I would've been given that BMW or Corvette when I was younger, without working for it, and without experiencing the alternative, what would I have ever had to look forward to?! And would I appreciate what I have now? I don't think so.
Tuesday, January 18, 2005
Coleman update
Got 15 minutes? Read this post first. No time? Here's the quick and dirty: This small-town undercover cop named Coleman is an incompetent, corrupt, racist liar. He arrested 46 people, 43 of which were black, on drug charges. But the cop was never able to turn over any drugs, he didn't use surveillance, and there was no fingerprint evidence. He scribbled notes on his knee. Yeah, I know.
Well, many of the cases were dismissed (some folks weren't even in town on the day they allegedly sold drugs to the cop!), and eventually many more were pardoned (after spending 2 years in prison!). And last week Coleman finally came to trial facing 3 perjury charges and up to 30 years in prison.
So here's the update. Coleman was given a 7-year sentence on PROBATION. No prison time whatsoever. I couldn't believe it. After sending 47 people to prison for a total of 750 years with no evidence other than his word (oh I did I mention a former employer also said he had "mental problems"), he only got probation. Ridiculous.
After the sentencing, Coleman summed up by telling the Judge, "I give you my word I'll be there," referring to the probation dept in the small town where the crap hit the fan.
His word, wow, that is just great coming from a 3x convicted perjurer.
Well, many of the cases were dismissed (some folks weren't even in town on the day they allegedly sold drugs to the cop!), and eventually many more were pardoned (after spending 2 years in prison!). And last week Coleman finally came to trial facing 3 perjury charges and up to 30 years in prison.
So here's the update. Coleman was given a 7-year sentence on PROBATION. No prison time whatsoever. I couldn't believe it. After sending 47 people to prison for a total of 750 years with no evidence other than his word (oh I did I mention a former employer also said he had "mental problems"), he only got probation. Ridiculous.
After the sentencing, Coleman summed up by telling the Judge, "I give you my word I'll be there," referring to the probation dept in the small town where the crap hit the fan.
His word, wow, that is just great coming from a 3x convicted perjurer.
Monday, January 17, 2005
It's fixed!
Hooray for MooCow!!!!!
Many many thanks to MooCow, Bathroom Reading, and Darth for letting me know that they were not able to view my blog in Firefox. Can you believe they actually made the effort to open internet explorer browser just to read my little ol' blog? MooCow offered to look at my code and found the pesky little error in the site meter code, so I was able to delete it, and now things seem to be working just fine. What a relief, thank you so so so much. Not only is MooCow a brainiac, he's hilarious. Check these guys out.
Many many thanks to MooCow, Bathroom Reading, and Darth for letting me know that they were not able to view my blog in Firefox. Can you believe they actually made the effort to open internet explorer browser just to read my little ol' blog? MooCow offered to look at my code and found the pesky little error in the site meter code, so I was able to delete it, and now things seem to be working just fine. What a relief, thank you so so so much. Not only is MooCow a brainiac, he's hilarious. Check these guys out.
Friday, January 14, 2005
Friday Feast
I originally saw this on Jessica's blog, and I've had the prompts for several weeks without really feeling inspired to do it, but today seems like a good day to start. My other lazy option was Friday Catblogging. I lurve my kitties, but I'm sure you guys would grow bored with their whiskered faces pretty quickly. Maybe I'll alternate...
The truth though is that I'm still pretty ticked with the Firefox issue. I hate that people are having to use Explorer just to look at my blog. I know that is incredibly frustrating, I am so sorry guys. My fiance is going to try a few new things over the weekend too. If anyone thinks of anything, please please email me at texasbiscuit at gmail dot com.
Okay, back to the Friday Feast, 5 enticing courses for your mind to gobble up.
Appetizer: If you could have a free subscription to any online service, which would you like to have?
Uh, I am missing something? What exactly is an "online service"?! Pay porn sites maybe?! I googled and found lots of links to business organizations. Boring sites I wouldn't want to spend any more time with even if they were free! What a non-answer that was. I'm obviously not making up these questions.
Soup: Describe your bathroom (furnishings, colors, etc.).
I live in an apt, so am stuck with the wallpaper which is a horrid beige and navy plaid. Bleh. With a solid paint I would be happy with the other decor - purple butterflys on a sheer ivory shower curtain, and coordinating purple and ivory butterfly accessories. Can't wait to have a house to paint and wallpaper and carpet just the way I want!
Salad: What does the shape of a triangle make you think of?
My mom used to be into non-traditional metaphysical-healing-meditation stuff when I was little. I remember we used to listen to relaxation tapes together, and there was a large paper triangle with I think blues and yellows on it that we focused on. I think there was a pyramid in the middle. The tape directs you to "stare at the triangle"... "use your mind's eye" ... "find your center". I can still hear the guy's deep soothing voice, "reeeeeelax".
Main Course: Name 3 things or activities that you consider to be luxuries.
These are necessary luxuries of course: massages, an expensive pair of heels, snow days, anything leather, bubble baths, a good bottle of wine, hand written letters from loved ones - oh wait, did someone say three things?
Dessert: What was the last really great movie you watched?
The movie that made me laugh the hardest in the past few months was Meet the Fockers. I absolutely love the real-life relationships between spouses and parents and in-laws. You can't make that stuff up.
The truth though is that I'm still pretty ticked with the Firefox issue. I hate that people are having to use Explorer just to look at my blog. I know that is incredibly frustrating, I am so sorry guys. My fiance is going to try a few new things over the weekend too. If anyone thinks of anything, please please email me at texasbiscuit at gmail dot com.
Okay, back to the Friday Feast, 5 enticing courses for your mind to gobble up.
Appetizer: If you could have a free subscription to any online service, which would you like to have?
Uh, I am missing something? What exactly is an "online service"?! Pay porn sites maybe?! I googled and found lots of links to business organizations. Boring sites I wouldn't want to spend any more time with even if they were free! What a non-answer that was. I'm obviously not making up these questions.
Soup: Describe your bathroom (furnishings, colors, etc.).
I live in an apt, so am stuck with the wallpaper which is a horrid beige and navy plaid. Bleh. With a solid paint I would be happy with the other decor - purple butterflys on a sheer ivory shower curtain, and coordinating purple and ivory butterfly accessories. Can't wait to have a house to paint and wallpaper and carpet just the way I want!
Salad: What does the shape of a triangle make you think of?
My mom used to be into non-traditional metaphysical-healing-meditation stuff when I was little. I remember we used to listen to relaxation tapes together, and there was a large paper triangle with I think blues and yellows on it that we focused on. I think there was a pyramid in the middle. The tape directs you to "stare at the triangle"... "use your mind's eye" ... "find your center". I can still hear the guy's deep soothing voice, "reeeeeelax".
Main Course: Name 3 things or activities that you consider to be luxuries.
These are necessary luxuries of course: massages, an expensive pair of heels, snow days, anything leather, bubble baths, a good bottle of wine, hand written letters from loved ones - oh wait, did someone say three things?
Dessert: What was the last really great movie you watched?
The movie that made me laugh the hardest in the past few months was Meet the Fockers. I absolutely love the real-life relationships between spouses and parents and in-laws. You can't make that stuff up.
Thursday, January 13, 2005
Firefox question
Yes, I recognize that I could/should go to Mozilla for help, but I figured I'd be lazy and put the request out there to you guys first. I'm only able to use Firefox at home on my laptop. I can see my blog just fine. At work I have to use Explorer. The only problem I have from work is that the links are the same color as the text so they can't be seen, but I was hoping that was just me and this crappy computer.
However, today I've been informed by two lovely readers that they can't view my blog in Firefox. Hmmm, why could this be?! And is this why I still can't manage to get to 1000 hits? Are people put off by my lack of tech knowledge and inability to test my own product before I put it out there for the public?
Oh dear. I need help.
Does anyone have an idea as to why this would happen, and more importantly, what code needs to be tweaked to fix it? I've been meaning to make some changes to the blog anyway (especially to update my blog list - I haven't forgotten about you guys that I've recently started reading!), but now I am officially motivated.
Besides the Firefox issue, this is also the time for any other suggestions or recommendations. Let me have it!
However, today I've been informed by two lovely readers that they can't view my blog in Firefox. Hmmm, why could this be?! And is this why I still can't manage to get to 1000 hits? Are people put off by my lack of tech knowledge and inability to test my own product before I put it out there for the public?
Oh dear. I need help.
Does anyone have an idea as to why this would happen, and more importantly, what code needs to be tweaked to fix it? I've been meaning to make some changes to the blog anyway (especially to update my blog list - I haven't forgotten about you guys that I've recently started reading!), but now I am officially motivated.
Besides the Firefox issue, this is also the time for any other suggestions or recommendations. Let me have it!
His Holiness
I asked my fiance last night (that still sounds so weird - how long does it take to get used to that new title: fiance?) if he had any ideas about what I should refer to him on my blog now that he is no longer "the boyfriend". My initial thought was "super stud", he recommended "his holiness". Nice.
Wednesday, January 12, 2005
Free of Garbage or Full of Garbage?
Tom Coleman is on trial for perjury this week at my courthouse. We were expecting a huge media turnout (17 national news agencies had reserved seats in the courtroom) and honestly I wouldn't have been shocked to see rioting, but it turns out there hasn't been too much drama - at least not today.
Here's his long but fascinating story dating back to 1999. If you have a few minutes, it'’ll be worth your time:
Tulia, Texas (about 75 miles north of Lubbock) is the site of what's been called one of the worst miscarriages of justice in recent memory. An undercover narcotics officer named Tom Coleman arrested 46 people - nearly all of them black - on charges of being cocaine dealers, sending many of them to prison for a total of 750 years.
You won't believe the investigator’s background:
So who is Tom Coleman? He's a former rodeo cowboy with a spotty record in law enforcement, and no experience as an undercover narcotics agent. Nevertheless, he was hired by the local sheriff in 1998 to rout out drug dealers in Tulia, a desolate farm town of some 5,000 people who have fallen on hard times.
Coleman posed as a menacing ex-convict with a taste for drugs, and infiltrated Tulia's small black community. He reported to his bosses that he had bought more than a half a pound of cocaine during his 18-month investigation.
"There was a drug problem in Tulia, and there still is. They're selling drugs right now and I guarantee you they are," says Coleman. "Why did I do it for 18 months? Because I hate dope dealers and I hate dope. Period. That's it."
Early one morning in 1999, Coleman's efforts culminated in the arrests of 13 percent of Tulia's adult black population. They were rousted out of bed, paraded in front of local television cameras in handcuffs - many of them half-dressed - and charged with selling cocaine to Coleman at various times over the course of his investigation.
The town newspaper declared: "Tulia's streets cleared of garbage."
And these statements from the people who were arrested and charged:
Freddie Brookins, Jr., 26, a former high school star athlete with no criminal record was sentenced to 20 years in prison. “"It wasn't an investigation,"” says Brookins. “"It was just a roundup, a West Texas roundup, that's all it was.”"
Yul Bryant, a 33-year-old sales clerk, was charged with selling $160 worth of cocaine. "“I was getting dressed, and when they knocked on the door, I was still in my boxers. They told me where I was going I didn't need no clothes.”"
Billy Wafer, a 45-year-old warehouse foreman, was charged with dealing 2.3 grams of cocaine to Coleman. "“I guess they wanted to be on the map,"” says Wafer. “"They wanted to be on the map by arresting so many and making this the biggest drug bust that they ever had. Whether it was done right or wrong.”"
Why was nearly everyone that Coleman arrested black? Did he intentionally target the black community? It may be no coincidence that the road led Coleman to the town's black community. It was well known that he had used racial slurs in front of his superior officers in Tulia.
Don't stop now, it gets much worse:
"Everybody's making a big deal. ‘Oh, God, he said the word 'nigger' - like, let's put him in the electric chair,'” says Coleman. “"Well, yeah, that word nigger was bad back in the '20s, '30s, '40s, and '50s and '60s and '70s, but now it's just a common slang, you know? I mean you can watch TV and hear that word, you know? It's a greeting.” "
Are you fucking kidding me??!
Coleman, who doesn’t consider himself a racist, said he used the "N" word to fit in with blacks during his investigation. He admits he also used it among his white friends: "“The word nigger, yes sir, I've used that word. I've used it a lot. Yeah, '‘What's up, nigger'".’”
In court:
They were all given harsh sentences, ranging from 20 to 341 years in prison, even though the arrests had turned up no cocaine, no drug paraphernalia, no weapons, no money, or any other signs of drug dealing.
The convictions were based solely on the uncorroborated word of Coleman, who had followed none of the standard procedures routinely used in undercover drug operations across the country.
Coleman acknowledges that he wore no wire, had no partner to corroborate his testimony, collected no fingerprint evidence and had no surveillance video or still images to prove guilt. “[Such evidence] would have helped, but that’s not how the operation went.” The only records he made of the supposed drug buys were notes of the names, dates and places - which he scrawled on his leg.
Ah, the kingpin's story:
One of the harshest sentences of all - 90 years - went to Joe Moore, a 60-year-old hog farmer who has lived much of his life in this one-room shack. Authorities described him as the drug kingpin of Tulia.
“"I didn't even know nothin' about a kingpin. I don't even know how a kingpin lives or nothing,"” says Moore. "“I don't know nothin' 'bout that. But I know they live 30 times better than this. No, a 100 times better than this.”"
The cases that were dismissed:
Defendant Billy Wafer, who had his case dismissed when he was able to show - with timecards - that he was at work at the local seed processing plant at the same time that Coleman testified Wafer was selling him cocaine. Case dismissed.
Bryant had witnesses who said he was at a fair 50 miles away at the time Coleman said he sold him drugs. And that's not all. “"In my police report he said I was a tall black man with bushy type hair,"” says Bryant. "“I'm 5 foot 7, I don't have, I haven't had any hair in like six, seven years. It wasn't me."” Case dismissed.
And then there's the case of Tonya White. Coleman says she sold him $190 worth of cocaine in Tulia on Oct. 9, 1998, at 10:15 a.m. “"That's not possible because I was at the bank in Oklahoma City at 9:45 a.m. withdrawing $8. And they got my signature on my withdrawal slip,”" says White.
Dr. Alan Bean said it best, "Poor drug dealers smoke tiny “rocks” of crack cocaine that can be purchased on the street for between $5 and $20. Powder cocaine is known as a “rich man's drug” because it costs well over a hundred dollars to buy a little baggie of powder the size of your thumb. Poor users turn to crack because they can't afford to buy powder cocaine. You can't sell what you can´t afford to buy."
What the jury never heard about Coleman:
Police officers he had formerly worked for said he needed constant supervision and had possible mental problems. They also said that he had abruptly walked off a previous job, leaving behind $7,000 in unpaid debts -- prompting the sheriff in that town to warn that, "Mr. Coleman should not be in law enforcement."
What's more, in the middle of Coleman's undercover investigation in Tulia, the man who hired him, the sheriff, arrested him on charges of stealing from a county where he had previously worked. He was permitted to continue his undercover operation in Tulia.
Why he was allowed to get away with this shoddy work:
The U.S. Justice Department has spent billions of dollars over the years funding drug task forces in small towns like Tulia. The more arrests and convictions a task force makes, the more money it receives the following year, which can be used in virtually any way it sees fit. In 1999, Coleman was rewarded for his efforts in Tulia.
The Attorney General of Texas named him outstanding officer of the year, but just six months ago, Coleman was called upon to defend his conduct before a state judge who was hearing appeals from some of those convicted in the Tulia sting.
The judge said Coleman’'s testimony was “absolutely riddled with perjury,” and that he was "the most devious, non-responsive law enforcement witness this court has witnessed in 25 years on the bench in Texas."
“"Yes sir. But that's his opinion. A lot of the juries during the trials, they spoke their verdict,"” says Coleman. “"And that was a lot of juries. And that's just one judge.”"
But that one judge set the Tulia defendants free this summer. Among them were Joe Moore, Kizzie White, and Freddie Brookins, Jr. Then 35 defendants were pardoned by Texas Gov. Rick Perry, after the judge accused Coleman of being a liar, thief and racist.
The Tulia defendants later settled a civil suit against the officials they say were responsible for their wrongful convictions. They will share a $6 million settlement. They'll never be able to get back the years they spent in prison, but the money will surely help ease some of their pain.
Tom Coleman is facing up to 10 years in prison and a $10,000 fine on each of three felony charges of aggravated perjury.
Today the court heard testimony related to Coleman's alleged theft of gasoline. I wasn't able to sit in on the testimony today, but evidently he's screwed because the prosecution is proving up the fact that Coleman lied on the stand. Perjury is a bitch, and 30 years in prison for a dishonest, incompetent, corrupt, irrational and racist cop will be just what he deserves.
Here's his long but fascinating story dating back to 1999. If you have a few minutes, it'’ll be worth your time:
Tulia, Texas (about 75 miles north of Lubbock) is the site of what's been called one of the worst miscarriages of justice in recent memory. An undercover narcotics officer named Tom Coleman arrested 46 people - nearly all of them black - on charges of being cocaine dealers, sending many of them to prison for a total of 750 years.
You won't believe the investigator’s background:
So who is Tom Coleman? He's a former rodeo cowboy with a spotty record in law enforcement, and no experience as an undercover narcotics agent. Nevertheless, he was hired by the local sheriff in 1998 to rout out drug dealers in Tulia, a desolate farm town of some 5,000 people who have fallen on hard times.
Coleman posed as a menacing ex-convict with a taste for drugs, and infiltrated Tulia's small black community. He reported to his bosses that he had bought more than a half a pound of cocaine during his 18-month investigation.
"There was a drug problem in Tulia, and there still is. They're selling drugs right now and I guarantee you they are," says Coleman. "Why did I do it for 18 months? Because I hate dope dealers and I hate dope. Period. That's it."
Early one morning in 1999, Coleman's efforts culminated in the arrests of 13 percent of Tulia's adult black population. They were rousted out of bed, paraded in front of local television cameras in handcuffs - many of them half-dressed - and charged with selling cocaine to Coleman at various times over the course of his investigation.
The town newspaper declared: "Tulia's streets cleared of garbage."
And these statements from the people who were arrested and charged:
Freddie Brookins, Jr., 26, a former high school star athlete with no criminal record was sentenced to 20 years in prison. “"It wasn't an investigation,"” says Brookins. “"It was just a roundup, a West Texas roundup, that's all it was.”"
Yul Bryant, a 33-year-old sales clerk, was charged with selling $160 worth of cocaine. "“I was getting dressed, and when they knocked on the door, I was still in my boxers. They told me where I was going I didn't need no clothes.”"
Billy Wafer, a 45-year-old warehouse foreman, was charged with dealing 2.3 grams of cocaine to Coleman. "“I guess they wanted to be on the map,"” says Wafer. “"They wanted to be on the map by arresting so many and making this the biggest drug bust that they ever had. Whether it was done right or wrong.”"
Why was nearly everyone that Coleman arrested black? Did he intentionally target the black community? It may be no coincidence that the road led Coleman to the town's black community. It was well known that he had used racial slurs in front of his superior officers in Tulia.
Don't stop now, it gets much worse:
"Everybody's making a big deal. ‘Oh, God, he said the word 'nigger' - like, let's put him in the electric chair,'” says Coleman. “"Well, yeah, that word nigger was bad back in the '20s, '30s, '40s, and '50s and '60s and '70s, but now it's just a common slang, you know? I mean you can watch TV and hear that word, you know? It's a greeting.” "
Are you fucking kidding me??!
Coleman, who doesn’t consider himself a racist, said he used the "N" word to fit in with blacks during his investigation. He admits he also used it among his white friends: "“The word nigger, yes sir, I've used that word. I've used it a lot. Yeah, '‘What's up, nigger'".’”
In court:
They were all given harsh sentences, ranging from 20 to 341 years in prison, even though the arrests had turned up no cocaine, no drug paraphernalia, no weapons, no money, or any other signs of drug dealing.
The convictions were based solely on the uncorroborated word of Coleman, who had followed none of the standard procedures routinely used in undercover drug operations across the country.
Coleman acknowledges that he wore no wire, had no partner to corroborate his testimony, collected no fingerprint evidence and had no surveillance video or still images to prove guilt. “[Such evidence] would have helped, but that’s not how the operation went.” The only records he made of the supposed drug buys were notes of the names, dates and places - which he scrawled on his leg.
Ah, the kingpin's story:
One of the harshest sentences of all - 90 years - went to Joe Moore, a 60-year-old hog farmer who has lived much of his life in this one-room shack. Authorities described him as the drug kingpin of Tulia.
“"I didn't even know nothin' about a kingpin. I don't even know how a kingpin lives or nothing,"” says Moore. "“I don't know nothin' 'bout that. But I know they live 30 times better than this. No, a 100 times better than this.”"
The cases that were dismissed:
Defendant Billy Wafer, who had his case dismissed when he was able to show - with timecards - that he was at work at the local seed processing plant at the same time that Coleman testified Wafer was selling him cocaine. Case dismissed.
Bryant had witnesses who said he was at a fair 50 miles away at the time Coleman said he sold him drugs. And that's not all. “"In my police report he said I was a tall black man with bushy type hair,"” says Bryant. "“I'm 5 foot 7, I don't have, I haven't had any hair in like six, seven years. It wasn't me."” Case dismissed.
And then there's the case of Tonya White. Coleman says she sold him $190 worth of cocaine in Tulia on Oct. 9, 1998, at 10:15 a.m. “"That's not possible because I was at the bank in Oklahoma City at 9:45 a.m. withdrawing $8. And they got my signature on my withdrawal slip,”" says White.
Dr. Alan Bean said it best, "Poor drug dealers smoke tiny “rocks” of crack cocaine that can be purchased on the street for between $5 and $20. Powder cocaine is known as a “rich man's drug” because it costs well over a hundred dollars to buy a little baggie of powder the size of your thumb. Poor users turn to crack because they can't afford to buy powder cocaine. You can't sell what you can´t afford to buy."
What the jury never heard about Coleman:
Police officers he had formerly worked for said he needed constant supervision and had possible mental problems. They also said that he had abruptly walked off a previous job, leaving behind $7,000 in unpaid debts -- prompting the sheriff in that town to warn that, "Mr. Coleman should not be in law enforcement."
What's more, in the middle of Coleman's undercover investigation in Tulia, the man who hired him, the sheriff, arrested him on charges of stealing from a county where he had previously worked. He was permitted to continue his undercover operation in Tulia.
Why he was allowed to get away with this shoddy work:
The U.S. Justice Department has spent billions of dollars over the years funding drug task forces in small towns like Tulia. The more arrests and convictions a task force makes, the more money it receives the following year, which can be used in virtually any way it sees fit. In 1999, Coleman was rewarded for his efforts in Tulia.
The Attorney General of Texas named him outstanding officer of the year, but just six months ago, Coleman was called upon to defend his conduct before a state judge who was hearing appeals from some of those convicted in the Tulia sting.
The judge said Coleman’'s testimony was “absolutely riddled with perjury,” and that he was "the most devious, non-responsive law enforcement witness this court has witnessed in 25 years on the bench in Texas."
“"Yes sir. But that's his opinion. A lot of the juries during the trials, they spoke their verdict,"” says Coleman. “"And that was a lot of juries. And that's just one judge.”"
But that one judge set the Tulia defendants free this summer. Among them were Joe Moore, Kizzie White, and Freddie Brookins, Jr. Then 35 defendants were pardoned by Texas Gov. Rick Perry, after the judge accused Coleman of being a liar, thief and racist.
The Tulia defendants later settled a civil suit against the officials they say were responsible for their wrongful convictions. They will share a $6 million settlement. They'll never be able to get back the years they spent in prison, but the money will surely help ease some of their pain.
Tom Coleman is facing up to 10 years in prison and a $10,000 fine on each of three felony charges of aggravated perjury.
Today the court heard testimony related to Coleman's alleged theft of gasoline. I wasn't able to sit in on the testimony today, but evidently he's screwed because the prosecution is proving up the fact that Coleman lied on the stand. Perjury is a bitch, and 30 years in prison for a dishonest, incompetent, corrupt, irrational and racist cop will be just what he deserves.
Tuesday, January 11, 2005
I'm engaged!!
Okay, sorry to spill the beans so quickly, but you would've guessed before the end of the story anyway. So here's how it happened... Ladies, enjoy. Gentlemen, I'll try to have something a little more masculine for you to read about tomorrow.
My boyfriend (ak - fiance now!) told me Thursday he was planning a last-minute trip to Austin for us for the weekend. I guess he never really said so, but I just assumed it was for my birthday. He mentioned we were going to have a nice dinner on Friday, so I took the opportunity to go shopping for something nice. I found a fabulous black suit with some teeny tiny hot pick dots. Also picked up some great Cole Haan black strappy pumps with hot pink piping on sale - haven't bought nice shoes for myself in ages - it felt good. I don't know, I just felt the urge to splurge.
So Friday we drove up to Austin, nice road trip, about 7 hours with stops. We pulled up at the Omni downtown and the valet helped me out of the car. I figured we just had a regular room, but I was shocked to walk in to find a huge suite with 3 balconies, living and dining areas, full kitchen, and an amazing jacuzzi tub. Most gals mighta suspected something about this time, but he's just a generous guy and I'm still thinking it was a birthday treat. So we got fancied up for dinner and headed out on the town.
He took me to the Driskill, a historic landmark built in 1886. It is a magnificent hotel (special significance b/c he stayed in the hotel with his late-grandmother in the early 90's when his sister got married in Austin) with a five-star restaurant. I felt so fancy! We sat in a special booth where every president and first lady since LBJ & Ladybird sat, and every governor of Texas since the late 1800's. You can just feel the history in the place.
I ate the most delicious meal of my life on Friday. Check out Chef Bull's sample menu. How great does this food sound? I had a five course crustacean prix fixe ending with Santa Barbara Spiny Lobster Tail, Lobster Risotto, Pernod Braised Leeks, and Vanilla Apricot Gastrique. Oh man, talk about an orgy in my mouth - I've never had anything like it. So, the meal was extraordinary, but the next few moments were even more spectacular.
The dessert was served on large square plate. I think it was a butternut rum cake, but honestly, I kinda lost it about that time, because on the plate was a beautiful diamond and emerald engagement ring and the words "will you marry me?" written on the plate in chocolate. How romantic is that?! Of course, I said "yes!" So we're engaged!
We spent the rest of the weekend drinking it up on 6th street and in the plush hotel bar, eating more fabulous food, walking around UT, shopping, calling friends and family with the good news, and above all enjoying the bed and jacuzzi!!!
What a fantastic weekend! I'm so thrilled to be in love and engaged to such a wonderful and romantic fella. More on the wedding, the ring, and maybe even some pics in the coming weeks...
Oooooohh
I'll be posting all about my extended fun-filled weekend later tonight. Sorry for the huge delay - more details as soon as possible !
Friday, January 7, 2005
Mixing drinks
This is . : A : .'s blog and you should check it out.
. : A : . wrote this. Isn't it great?!
My boyfriend and I are headed to Austin this weekend - an early celebration for my birthday.
I hope everyone has a fantabulous weekend!!
. : A : . wrote this. Isn't it great?!
Mixing drinks
The drink mingled
With my thoughts
And my thoughts
Gave way
To my secrets
The clear drink
A perfect place
A hiding place
To create
New memories
My boyfriend and I are headed to Austin this weekend - an early celebration for my birthday.
I hope everyone has a fantabulous weekend!!
Thursday, January 6, 2005
Does ANYONE like their job?
A friend stopped by my office yesterday, and amidst the normal chit-chat about new years, plans for this weekend, school and the like, he asked, "so do you like your new position?". Normally my answer would be yeah, it's a nice change of pace, and change the subject. But I got the idea that he really wanted to know... So I got to thinking...
No, in the grand scheme of things, I do not like my job.
Don't get me wrong, I don't hate it my any means. It has it's benefits. My supervisor is great. His office is in another building and I only run into him about once a week, if that. I have my own rather large private office in the courthouse (with a locking door and no window - great for lunch-time naps). I've met some great people who I expect will be indispensable contacts and references in the future. Oh, and I can't neglect to acknowledge unlimited and, as far as I know, unmonitored internet access.
But it comes down to this. my current position is completely un.ful.filling.
When I was a probation officer I actually helped people (or at least that is what I like to tell myself). I wasn't the type who screamed and threw pencil cups when an offender confessed to smoking a joint or being out past curfew. I was more the gal who listened to what was going with their spouse, the abuse they may have suffered as a child, the substance dependence they may (or may not be) fighting against, inability to find a stable job and out of control financial problems.
Now god knows I'm not the one to "fix" most of their issues, but as the vast majority of my probationers came from completely dysfunctional homes, and it is a rare occasion that they'd had someone who even took an interest in their story. So that was me. Of course I had a job to do too, to monitor compliance, and I did that as well, but I found that just listening and referring people to an outside resource when appropriate was a lot more effective than telling them what a fuck up they are, how I'm sending them to jail for non-compliance, and how they will never amount to anything if they stay on this path (a technique that is amazingly popular in the law-enforcement community).
Now I rarely meet with offenders, and never get a chance for repeated contact and rapport building. And I miss that. I am grateful for the promotion and the raise, but frankly anyone with enough common sense and respect to be able to handle themselves in a courtroom and with judges could do this job. When I'm not in court explaining probation to new offenders or visiting with the DAs about probationer's violations, I'm basically just pushing papers, getting signatures, and making sure legal documents are filed in a timely manner.
It's pretty discouraging to think that I'm wasting my days away doing this. I could be doing so much more. And will be ... soon. Only one more year of grad school until I can get back to doing what I love - counseling - working with people in need - in need of assistance - in need of encouragement - in need of emotional support - in need of skills to deal with the bull shit in their lives - in need of someone to listen. Just one more year...
No, in the grand scheme of things, I do not like my job.
Don't get me wrong, I don't hate it my any means. It has it's benefits. My supervisor is great. His office is in another building and I only run into him about once a week, if that. I have my own rather large private office in the courthouse (with a locking door and no window - great for lunch-time naps). I've met some great people who I expect will be indispensable contacts and references in the future. Oh, and I can't neglect to acknowledge unlimited and, as far as I know, unmonitored internet access.
But it comes down to this. my current position is completely un.ful.filling.
When I was a probation officer I actually helped people (or at least that is what I like to tell myself). I wasn't the type who screamed and threw pencil cups when an offender confessed to smoking a joint or being out past curfew. I was more the gal who listened to what was going with their spouse, the abuse they may have suffered as a child, the substance dependence they may (or may not be) fighting against, inability to find a stable job and out of control financial problems.
Now god knows I'm not the one to "fix" most of their issues, but as the vast majority of my probationers came from completely dysfunctional homes, and it is a rare occasion that they'd had someone who even took an interest in their story. So that was me. Of course I had a job to do too, to monitor compliance, and I did that as well, but I found that just listening and referring people to an outside resource when appropriate was a lot more effective than telling them what a fuck up they are, how I'm sending them to jail for non-compliance, and how they will never amount to anything if they stay on this path (a technique that is amazingly popular in the law-enforcement community).
Now I rarely meet with offenders, and never get a chance for repeated contact and rapport building. And I miss that. I am grateful for the promotion and the raise, but frankly anyone with enough common sense and respect to be able to handle themselves in a courtroom and with judges could do this job. When I'm not in court explaining probation to new offenders or visiting with the DAs about probationer's violations, I'm basically just pushing papers, getting signatures, and making sure legal documents are filed in a timely manner.
It's pretty discouraging to think that I'm wasting my days away doing this. I could be doing so much more. And will be ... soon. Only one more year of grad school until I can get back to doing what I love - counseling - working with people in need - in need of assistance - in need of encouragement - in need of emotional support - in need of skills to deal with the bull shit in their lives - in need of someone to listen. Just one more year...
Tuesday, January 4, 2005
Musical Honesty
I saw this here first.
Instructions:
1. Open up the music player on your computer.
2. Set it to play your entire music collection.
3. Hit the "shuffle" command.
4. Tell us the title of the next ten songs that show up (with their musicians), no matter how embarrassing. That's right, no skipping that Carpenters tune that will totally destroy your hip credibility. It's time for total musical honesty.
1. Easy -– Lionel Richie
2. Song of the South -– Alabama
3. Blowin' Me Up –- JC Chasez
4. Der Kommisar –- Falco
5. Summertime –- DJ Jazzy Jeff
6. Songs About Rain -– Gary Allen
7. Lust for Life –- Iggy Pop
8. Drunk in the Morning -– Kid Rock
9. Bad Girls -– Donna Summer
10. Leaving on a Jet Plane -– Jewel
Okay, I am fairly mortified by the JC Chasez song. Oh well. Otherwise it's a pretty accurate mix of oldies, country, and rock.
By the way, if you are using Firefox (and you should be!) and haven'’t downloaded this extension yet, you should do so asap. It adds a tiny little control bar to navigate your mp3's on your browser so you don'’t have to keep going back and forth to your iTunes window when you want to change songs. You'll love it!
Instructions:
1. Open up the music player on your computer.
2. Set it to play your entire music collection.
3. Hit the "shuffle" command.
4. Tell us the title of the next ten songs that show up (with their musicians), no matter how embarrassing. That's right, no skipping that Carpenters tune that will totally destroy your hip credibility. It's time for total musical honesty.
1. Easy -– Lionel Richie
2. Song of the South -– Alabama
3. Blowin' Me Up –- JC Chasez
4. Der Kommisar –- Falco
5. Summertime –- DJ Jazzy Jeff
6. Songs About Rain -– Gary Allen
7. Lust for Life –- Iggy Pop
8. Drunk in the Morning -– Kid Rock
9. Bad Girls -– Donna Summer
10. Leaving on a Jet Plane -– Jewel
Okay, I am fairly mortified by the JC Chasez song. Oh well. Otherwise it's a pretty accurate mix of oldies, country, and rock.
By the way, if you are using Firefox (and you should be!) and haven'’t downloaded this extension yet, you should do so asap. It adds a tiny little control bar to navigate your mp3's on your browser so you don'’t have to keep going back and forth to your iTunes window when you want to change songs. You'll love it!
Monday, January 3, 2005
Medium
Medium ... and that's just how I felt about it ... just kinda ho-hum. I'd been looking forward to this new show for a month or more. I've always been intrigued by this kind of program - mediums, psychics, ghosts, UFOs, the supernatural, and anything, well - weird. Do you remember Twin Peaks? Man, I really miss that show (the dancing midget, Laura Palmer, BOB - shit, I can still picture one of the last episodes when he was crouching by the couch - so freakin' scary!).
I know Medium is based on the work of a real person, so maybe they couldn't take too many liberties with her work, but I was a bit disappointed in her portrayal. Seems unrealistic that she can not only "talk" to dead folks, but also read the minds of the living, and pick up on clues from inanimate objects. Come on, doesn't she get any false or dead readings - people who just won't/can't communicate with her? Oh well, I know ACW doesn't buy it, but I WANT to believe. I'll give it another chance next week, but this show is no Twin Peaks or Pretender...
Besides, it portrays the Texas Rangers as cocky closed-minded asses. Maybe they are, I've never met one, but it just seems a tad stereotypical - I'm surprised they didn't show the Rangers riding in on their horses. Ugh.
I know Medium is based on the work of a real person, so maybe they couldn't take too many liberties with her work, but I was a bit disappointed in her portrayal. Seems unrealistic that she can not only "talk" to dead folks, but also read the minds of the living, and pick up on clues from inanimate objects. Come on, doesn't she get any false or dead readings - people who just won't/can't communicate with her? Oh well, I know ACW doesn't buy it, but I WANT to believe. I'll give it another chance next week, but this show is no Twin Peaks or Pretender...
Besides, it portrays the Texas Rangers as cocky closed-minded asses. Maybe they are, I've never met one, but it just seems a tad stereotypical - I'm surprised they didn't show the Rangers riding in on their horses. Ugh.
Sunday, January 2, 2005
Black eyed peas
Did you eat your black eyed peas for good luck in the new year? Why do southerners eat peas on Jan 1st?
Among the black-eyed pea hypotheses are that on Sherman’s crop-burning march through Georgia, black-eyed pea crops were left alone since Yankees thought they were weeds. Black-eyed peas and salt pork were all some Southerners had to keep themselves alive, so the tradition of associating these beans with good luck started there.
Saturday, January 1, 2005
New Year w/ Brad Pitt
Thursday after work we went to the sports bar for wings, a "couple" beers, and to watch the Holiday Bowl - Tech vs [some college in California] - not even sure of the final score but Tech won ... you can tell I'm a huge football fan.
After the game we walked across the street to the irish pub for a "couple" whiskey and diet cokes. Drank there until last call then chowed down on the best brisket burritos in west Texas (has nothing to do with the drunk-factor - it really is the best - if you are ever in Lubbock, you must go see Ferlis, his BBQ will amaze your taste buds).
Then we stayed up until 4:30, well, um, you know.
After nursing that whiskey hangover the BF and I were less than thrilled about attending the New Years Eve party we'd been invited to on Friday. I wanted to go see my friends and meet their significant others, but sure didn't want to drink anymore. But, I made my dips, got dressed up and we headed to the party anyway.
45 minutes later, we were still looking for the house. I had a good map, but the house was out in the country. My map had street names like Indiana and Quaker. The street signs had names like CR 1770 and CR 1850. WTF? I am just not good with country roads, we were lost as hell, and it was way dark. So we gratefully took that as a sign that we weren't meant to spend this new year's eve getting sloshed and clinking champagne glasses.
We found a familiar road and headed back into town. We enjoyed a scrumptious mexican meal at Ruby Tequila's then watched Oceans Twelve. The movie kinda blew, but you can't beat ringing in the new year with Brad Pitt & Julia Roberts.
It wasn't the mind-blowing drunk hook-up fests I've been reading about on a lot of blogs today, but it was a really nice night. And overall, I think it's a good predictor of the year to come. Less drinking, more responsible choices for the future, more special time with my loved ones. Plus, just for kicks, let's aim for a little more studying and a little less fast food, more blogging and less sleeping in pjs, more reading and less TV watching, more saving for a car and less impulse shopping at Target, more hand written letters to my grandmothers and less ice cream.
2005 is going to be a spectacular year. Bring it on!
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